Photos are perhaps the most common item families place in caskets. From wedding photos, graduations photos, family portraits, and any snapshot that captures the deceased lifetime works for their burial. Some families choose to add pictures with the frame, and others without the frame. Both are acceptable.
Anything combustible - like bottles of alcohol, or lighters. Pacemakers - they're removed before funerals because they can explode during cremation. Anything made from treated materials like leather, latex and vinyl - they can release fumes that are harmful to the environment. Jars or bottles made from plastic or glass.
Photos are one of the most popular items to place inside a coffin. With the exception of green burials, these can be buried and, in many cases, cremated with the person. Other popular examples of what to put in a casket include flowers, letters, books and, when a baby or child has died, a teddy or other soft toys.
Flowers have long been a tradition at funerals, with funeral flower arrangements often placed on top of the casket during transportation and during the funeral.
We recommend you select a photo where the deceased person is doing something he or she enjoyed which can be seen as a celebration of their life. Or use a photo which you know the deceased person liked.
You definitely do not want to take a picture of the casket, because that can be highly disrespectful, as well. If you want to take a picture of anything specific, like a decoration or the memorial display, you will need to ask the family for permission. If they do not agree, respect their wishes and do not insist.
Prints. It is often safest to go with a solid color, but there is nothing that precludes you from wearing an understated print.
Open Casket Funeral Etiquette
While some people find comfort in seeing their loved ones as they remember them, it may also be uncomfortable to others. If they have an open casket viewing, make sure you follow proper funeral etiquette: DON'T touch the body under any circumstances.
Other people may choose to bury their wedding ring with their spouses in the casket. Some hold on to their ring and gift it to a family member as a family heirloom. There is no right or wrong thing to do with your ring after your spouse's death. You should do what feels right and makes sense for you.
A rather large overstuffed pillow is included in the interior package of a finished casket. This pillow helps to hold the decedent in an inclined position. This position helps present a naturally comforting presentation to the survivors.
Coffins are not watertight so when the grave fills with water it also fills the coffin, which decomposes and rots the bodies faster.
Over time, coffins underground will decompose and eventually collapse. Covering the face before closing the casket adds an extra layer of protection and dignity for the deceased's face and can act as a symbolic final goodbye.
Gravesites reaching six feet helped prevent farmers from accidentally plowing up bodies. And you had the “rule of thumb,” origin unknown, that said graves should be as deep as the dead person is tall. Today, individual states set the depth of a grave.
Typically, legs are covered in a casket because of swelling in the feet that makes fitting shoes difficult. When swelling is not present, the legs may still be covered at a funeral due to cultural preferences, the type of casket used, the size and condition of the body, and aesthetic considerations.
What's really returned to you is the person's skeleton. Once you burn off all the water, soft tissue, organs, skin, hair, cremation container/casket, etc., what you're left with is bone. When complete, the bones are allowed to cool to a temperature that they can be handled and are placed into a processing machine.
By 50 years in, your tissues will have liquefied and disappeared, leaving behind mummified skin and tendons. Eventually these too will disintegrate, and after 80 years in that coffin, your bones will crack as the soft collagen inside them deteriorates, leaving nothing but the brittle mineral frame behind.
“My late spouse.”
The technically-correct way to refer to a spouse who passed away is as your “late husband” or “late wife." The term “late” is euphemistic, and it comes from an Old English phrase, “of late." In the original Old English, “of late” refers to a person who was recently, but is not presently, alive.
Cremation of a body can be done with or without clothing. Typically, if there has been a traditional funeral (with the body) present, the deceased will be cremated in whatever clothing they were wearing.
One of the wildest innovations is “living funerals.” You can attend a dry run of your own funeral, complete with casket, mourners, funeral procession, etc. You can witness the lavish proceedings without having an “out-of-body” experience, just an “out-of-disposable-income” experience.
In a closed casket funeral, the casket remains closed during the viewing and the funeral service. Family members and guests are not able to see the body, and some prefer this option for a variety of reasons.
As mentioned, most of the caskets are not airtight, and advanced decomposition will lead to unpleasant smells even in a closed service. However, it is especially important for funerals with open caskets, as all measures must be taken to ensure that loved ones can say their farewells before decomposition begins.
Avoid dressing in casual clothing, such as athletic wear, tank tops, or shorts. Skip the flip-flops, tennis shoes, sneakers, or boat shoes. Remove the neon necktie, purse, or accessory. Shy away from wearing jeans, even black ones, because they are considered too casual for a funeral.
Wearing dark grey or deep blue is just as appropriate as black, while brown and lighter greys are suitable for the vast majority of funeral services. However, unless specifically requested by the deceased or their family, you should avoid any bright colors such as yellows, oranges, pinks, and reds.