Not all forms fit neatly into categories either, but some of the most common types of insecurity include relationship insecurity, social insecurity, body image insecurity, job insecurity, and insecurity of basic needs.
Even a small relationship setback can trigger intense fear and insecurity. It can be common for someone with low self-esteem to experience relationship insecurity because they don't believe they're worthy of love. Or perhaps they've been teased, bullied, or the victim of physical, emotional, or sexual abuse.
“Some of the most common insecurities and relationships include emotional insecurity, attachment insecurity, physical insecurity, financial insecurity, professional insecurity, and social insecurity,” explains LaTonya P.
The core cause of insecurities in a relationship is often a lack of self-love. If one partner holds on to harmful limiting beliefs, like being afraid of failure or thinking that they don't deserve love, they won't be able to trust completely – and trust is the foundation of any relationship.
The fear of being socially judged is one of the most common forms of insecurity. Some people feel self-conscious, anxious, and fearful when in front of others. It doesn't matter whether it's a group of colleagues or family members. This can extend to even the smallest of social encounters like a date.
They are overly concerned about what others think of them. They never express a firm opinion. They suffer from a chronic inability to make decisions, even when the choices have little consequence. They frequently try to change the direction of projects and meetings.
A root fear: Overthinking stems from a particular insecurity or root fear. This insecurity may be from childhood, a past relationship, or general low self-esteem or trust issues.
A person with high levels of insecurity may often experience a lack of confidence regarding many aspects of life. It may be difficult for that person to form lasting relationships or attend to daily tasks, due to a self-perception of helplessness or inadequacy.
Red flags in a relationship include excessive jealousy and frequent lying. You should also be wary of a partner who frequently criticizes you or puts you down. Another major red flag is an unwillingness to compromise — relationships shouldn't be one-sided.
Red flags in a relationship are intuitive indicators that something needs to be questioned. Relationship red flags include feelings of insecurity and negative feedback from one's friends and family. Any kind of abuse is the biggest red flag in a relationship.
Communicate openly and honestly with your partner.
If you're feeling insecure, make sure to communicate openly and honestly with your partner. Tell them how you're feeling and why. It's also important to listen to what they have to say. They might have their own insecurities or triggers that you're not aware of.
The kind of childhood you had, past traumas, recent experiences of failure or rejection, loneliness, social anxiety, negative beliefs about yourself, perfectionism, or having a critical parent or partner can all contribute to insecurity.
“Men feel insecure about being seen as less-than,” says marriage and family therapist Hanalei Vierra, Ph. D. “Less than strong enough, less than smart enough, less than sexy enough, less than good-looking enough, less than funny enough, less than competent enough.”
Insecurity fuels a lack of emotional confidence and security, which can lead to major issues in a relationship. It's also worth noting that this is not the same thing as a lack of trust. "You may have all the trust in the world that your partner isn't going to cheat on you but still feel insecure," says Jeney.
A person who looks in the mirror and suffers to do it, is beautifully insecure. Yet, people who rarely look in the mirror and who are indifferent to their impact on others because they believe they are perfect in the relationship, may be insecure in a pathological way.
Women tend to feel insecure regarding their physical looks, relationships, and intelligence/professional abilities, whereas men often are more insecure about issues surrounding professional capacities, intelligence, athletic abilities, physical looks, and power.
Signs of Insecurity in Relationships
Feeling jealous of all the other people in their life and resenting the other people they are close to. Not taking your partner at their word and wanting to verify everything they tell you. Feeling like your partner may break up with you at any time.
One sign of insecurity is low self-esteem or negative self-image, particularly when that image seems to be inconsistent with external observation. Low self-esteem means you think badly about yourself or your abilities. It can lead to other problems, especially concerning mental health.