Sometimes people struggle to upon up with others because of mental health challenges that they're dealing with. This could include things like an eating disorder, bipolar disorder, or other personality disorder. People with depression and anxiety may also struggle with opening up on a deeper level with people.
Reticent can refer to someone who is restrained and formal, but it can also refer to someone who doesn't want to draw attention to herself or who prefers seclusion to other people.
Let them know that you'll try your best to stay calm, stay quiet, and hear the entire story. If you know yourself well and there are certain reactions you should avoid, mention those too. Let them know that you'll avoid yelling, blaming, or trying to fix the situation yourself. Show them something you used to hide.
The conflict between two people unwilling to let the other know what they feel will result in a perpetual standoff. From there, the relationship will only deteriorate. So if you're unable to speak your thoughts and feelings in conflict, it will frustrate the other person because they won't know what you're thinking.
One of the biggest reasons people are afraid to open up to their romantic partners is that they don't want to be rejected. Some people are afraid that their partners will leave them if they show their true selves.
A fear of vulnerability is a feeling of dread about being emotionally open with others. People who fear vulnerability often strive for perfectionism, close themselves off to friends, and keep loved ones at arm's length.
The need to avoid closure is born from a person's desire to avoid commitment or confrontation. In other words, someone avoiding closure may not want certain questions answered. They might be afraid of what they'll learn.
Some people even have a desire to avoid closure at all cost. This could be because they don't want to end up feeling guilty, rejected or criticised by others. Vagueness has its advantages, as soon as you have established exactly what happened, you are also subject to criticism – from yourself and others.
A closed-off person is someone who probably doesn't want to open up about his or her feelings. They might not feel comfortable sharing personal information or letting others into their world. A closed-off person usually has one main aim — to avoid a strong emotional connection with others.
Ask about learning, reading, and what's interesting or exciting. These are easy ways to get people to open up. Don't ask anything too personal too quickly–that can scare people off.
Alexithymia is when a person has difficulty experiencing, identifying, and expressing emotions.
At the end of a relationship, narcissists may become combative, passive-aggressive, hostile, and even more controlling. People with NPD often fail to understand other people's needs and values. They are hyper focused on their egos, but do not account for how their actions affect others.
Some may intentionally withhold closure, as they tend to intentionally withhold (communication, affection/sex, attention, etc) in relationships. They will withhold with the goal of getting what they want out of you. The idea is to catch onto the game-playing and deprive them of reactions, lol.
Narcissists are unable to handle uncomfortable feelings after a relationship ends. Instead, they discard you and will not think about you at all. They do not want to experience pain, which is also why they won't offer closure after a breakup.
You must begin to understand that closure is a selfish desire and not something you actually need in order to begin your healing process.
Trauma Bonding is when we are attracted to someone because they remind us of our past traumas. A good example of this would be if you have an ex who broke your heart, you might be attracted to people who remind you of that person.
Opening up and relinquishing your fears of rejection helps builds trust and honesty with others, fosters empathy, and builds stronger bonds. It's not always easy to be vulnerable and doing so often requires taking deliberate steps. The work is worth it.
The first reason is simple: Men often aren't encouraged to talk about their feelings. In fact, they're sometimes discouraged from doing so. Additionally, men often tend to shy away from vulnerable conversations. “It's a little social, but it's also a little biological,” Vossenkemper explains.