Insecure attachment oftentimes stems from childhood and is formed from caregiver-child relationships. Adults who deal with insecure attachment often lacked consistency, support, and reliability during childhood.
Attachment issues typically result from an early separation from parents, lengthy hospitalization, incidents of trauma, instances of neglect, or an otherwise troubled childhood. These issues may have an affect on a child's ability to form healthy, secure attachments later in life.
To recap, the following patterns of the caregiver tend to create insecure attachment: Inconsistent and unpredictable in how they respond to their child's needs. More aware of their own needs than those of their children's because they likely didn't receive the affection that they needed as a child.
Anxious attachment style is rooted in abandonment fears and care-related inconsistencies growing up. It's often developed when children are dependent on unreliable caregivers. They repeatedly learn that their caregivers may or may not come through when needed.
Anxious-Avoidant Attachment Style
Anxious-avoidants are not only afraid of intimacy and commitment, but they distrust and lash out emotionally at anyone who tries to get close to them. Anxious-avoidants often spend much of their time alone and miserable, or in abusive or dysfunctional relationships.
An adult with an anxious attachment style may become preoccupied with their relationship to the point of coming off as "clingy" or "needy." They often worry that their partner will leave or stop loving them. People with anxious attachment may also become manipulative when they feel that a relationship is threatened.
Children who are insecurely attached may: refuse to interact with others. avoid other people. exaggerate distress.
The Roots of Attachment Parenting
Attachment theory says an infant instinctively seeks closeness to a secure "attachment figure." This closeness is necessary for the infant to feel safe emotionally as well as for food and survival.
Rejection, criticisms, unkind words is what gets to a person, leading them to feel or think less of themselves. Children can too be prone to instances where they lose self-esteem and become insecure.
Attachment insecurity can therefore be viewed as a general vulnerability to mental disorders, with the particular symptomatology depending on genetic, developmental, and environmental factors.
Children with avoidant attachments can be overly self-reliant and maintain emotional distance from a rejecting caregiver; children with ambivalent (or preoccupied) attachments are chronically unsure of the caregiver's availability, which can lead them to be vigilant about remaining in close contact with caregivers; and ...
We first review basic principles of attachment theory and then discuss how two forms of attachment insecurity—anxiety and avoidance—are associated with unique patterns of emotion regulation in response to certain types of threatening/distressing situations.
Insecure attachment may take the form of avoidant, distant behavior or anxious clinging behavior. When children have insecure attachments with their parents, any number of negative consequences can follow, such as depression, anxiety, a lowered ability to cope with stress, and poor relationships with others.
Attachment trauma is painful, but healing is possible. It can be difficult to do on your own, but therapy, self-care, learning new ways to communicate, and connecting with yourself and others can be helpful.
The good news is, you can change your attachment style. If you don't have a secure attachment style, you can surely do self-work to shift into healthier relationship dynamics. And, if you're in a relationship, profound positive shifts can occur when both partners consciously invest in healing their attachment wounds.
Examples of Insecure Attachment Behavior in Children
Actively avoiding parents/caregivers. Frequent bouts of inconsolable crying. Being overly clingy with parents/caregivers. Masking emotions.
Individuals high in anxious attachment are more likely to engage in emotional manipulation and other harmful behaviors intended to prevent a partner from leaving the relationship, which in turn is linked to reduced relationship satisfaction, according to new research published in Evolutionary Behavioral Sciences.
People with attachment anxiety tend to have heightened collective narcissism, study finds. People with higher levels of attachment anxiety are more likely to have higher levels of collective narcissism, according to new scientific research published in the Personality and Social Psychology Bulletin.
Narcissists have insecure attachment styles that are either avoidant or anxious, or some combination. People with insecure attachment styles feel a basic insecurity stemming from relationships with early caregivers.