Unfortunately, there are several long-term effects of infidelity that can affect a person long after the cheating has stopped. These can be life-changing, and lead to the development of certain mental health conditions including chronic depression, anxiety, post-infidelity stress disorder, and betrayal trauma.
Cheating can also damage our brain's ability to process information accurately, leading to poorer decision-making. In addition, cheating can impact our ability to form and maintain relationships. When we cheat, we are breaking the bonds of trust that are essential for healthy relationships.
How does a woman feel after cheating? A woman goes through a whole range of emotions – anger, shame, anxiety, embarrassment, regret – after having cheated in a relationship. If she feels remorse for the pain she has caused to her partner, she starts to blame herself and finds it difficult to fix the situation.
The shock can be cataclysmic when you find out that your spouse or intimate partner cheated on you. You might feel sick to your stomach or actually throw up when you find that undeniable evidence. As time goes on, you might feel like you're in a kaleidoscope of memory.
People who cheat are likely impulsive and destructive at decision making. Instead of thinking about you and what happens to the relationship after cheating, they go based on what they want right now. Impulsiveness can be seen in other areas of the relationship, too. So keep an eye out.
Know That You Aren't a Bad Person
"Cheating is a very serious thing. It's a very big deal, and you should take the time to really sift through all of those feelings and reactions you're having," said Gloria. "At the same time, you also need to recognize that this doesn't make you a categorically terrible person.
Between one in four to five Americans have an affair in their lifetime. Among men, 68% feel guilty after having an affair. Even if they haven't confessed the affair, most cheating husbands will feel guilty and express that guilt in their behavior.
Suspicious Actions And Behaviors
Hiding the phone, shutting down the computer, discussing friends without giving names, or just being secretive after an affair is going to be a huge trigger. Any actions or behaviors, even flirting, can be an emotional trigger.
You'll likely experience different emotions as you process what happened. For instance, it's common to feel disappointed or betrayed after infidelity, so take a moment to recognize these feelings are normal.
Students who cheat and at first get away with it may, in the long run, feel guilty and suffer from low self-esteem. This loss of self-respect can lead to a host of other problems, including difficulties with their careers, families, and other important aspects of life.
Research shows that betrayed partners, after learning that their significant other has strayed, typically experience stress, anxiety, and depressive symptoms characteristic of Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder (PTSD).
Inherent Selfishness/Entitlement. Some cheaters, despite loving their partner and enjoying their relationship, feel they deserve more. Rather than seeing their vow of fidelity as a sacrifice made to and for their relationship, they view it as something to be worked around.
There is no doubt that having someone you love and care about cheat on you is hurtful. People who have experienced infidelity report feeling betrayed, losing trust, rage, and damaged self-esteem. These are just some of the feelings a person can experience because of infidelity.
Does the pain of infidelity ever go away? Although cheating can have a lasting effect on your mental health, it's possible to heal after infidelity, says Babita Spinelli, a psychotherapist licensed in New York, New Jersey, and Florida. Spinelli offers couples coaching for partners recovering after infidelity.
The Reasoning
There are many reasons people cheat, but according to Campbell, they usually fall into three categories: individual, relationship, and situational.
While experiences may vary, people commonly go through several stages after learning of their partner's betrayal, whether it be an emotional affair, hidden pornography use, or a sexual affair. They include shock, denial, obsession, anger, bargaining, mourning, acceptance and recovery.
A Rough Timeline. People need to understand that it takes at least two years for the shock waves of the infidelity to subside. That doesn't mean it's all bad for two years. In fact, couples may find they're doing better than ever during that period, but, at any given moment, reminders and triggers can still occur.
The Progression of Infidelity
For one person, it may be micro-cheating that turns into emotional infidelity, followed by physical infidelity. For another, digital infidelity may turn into physical infidelity. Someone who habitually cheats may go through different stages with each partner outside of the relationship.
Most definitely. While some cheaters take pride in how many people they've been without outside of their marriage, most unfaithful partners feel guilt and stress over breaking their marriage vows.
Some will behave very normally with their partners whereas, some men feel deep remorse and regret for cheating on their partner. “So, the main thing to keep in mind here is that every cheater is different. Their thoughts and feelings will be all over the place.
Strong partners
Most cheaters are afraid of being alone. Contradictory by nature, a cheating mate is actually terrified of his or her partner leaving. A strong spouse who is willing to walk away and have a life outside of the relationship is a scary scenario for an adulterer.