'Clingy' is a term often used to describe someone who does not have clear boundaries and tends to get over-attached emotionally or even physically. If your boyfriend is overly possessive, jealous (even of your non-romantic relationships), and irrationally insecure about your whereabouts, he is clingy.
What does it mean to be clingy? Clinginess is an act of resisting separation by holding tight or grasping onto something. In romantic relationships, the term is often used to describe someone who needs reassurance from their partners in a heavy-handed, frenzied, or even compulsive manner.
While clingy tendencies may have been “ok” in your previous relationship, being overly needy is generally considered a toxic dating habit.
He seems to get worried, anxious, or even angry when you don't text him back right away. If he demands to know what you're doing for most of the hours of the day, then that clearly isn't normal. Not only is your boyfriend clingy, but he is controlling and may not fully trust you, either.
What Does it Mean to Be Clingy? To be clingy is to stay highly close or dependent on someone for emotional support and a sense of security. Clingy people may feel desperate to latch onto their friend or partner and depend on them for constant check-ins, updates, and responsiveness to all needs.
“Clinginess can begin to cross the line from healthy to unhealthy when the relationship begins to take too much time and attention away from other aspects of your life,” explains Sullivan. “This can include neglecting friends and family and spending too much time in constant communication with your partner.
Acting clingy tends to stem from attachment issues and past relationships that were emotionally dramatic. Clinginess is not as severe as codependency, but it can be a symptom of this unhealthy relationship style.
Examples of Clinginess in Relationships
Calling your partner several times a day. Repeatedly messaging them throughout the day. Working yourself into a panic when they don't respond. Constantly stalking your partner's activities on social media.
People often become clingy because of low self-esteem or insecurity. This can cause your boyfriend to want your attention and reassurance that your relationship is secure. This can also cause him to be jealous when you give any attention to other people.
“A green flag is when a potential partner is considerate and aware of your boundaries, asks for clarification on them when they are unclear, and does not push them,” she says. Let's say you ask to meet at a bar or the park on the first date and have expressed that you're more comfortable meeting in public places.
Excessive Texting
For instance, texting non-stop could indicate that one partner is clingy and needy and feeling insecure in the relationship. While this is usually only harmful to the person doing the excessive texting, it can be smothering to the person on the receiving end.
What is a clingy girlfriend? A clingy girlfriend will struggle to give you space to be an independent person outside of the relationship. She'll constantly seek your attention, and the amount of it she gets from you will have a profound impact on her mood, happiness, and state of mind.
The term “clingy” has undeniable negative undertones as it's often used to describe a partner who is perceived as overly dependent, jealous, obsessive, and suffocating. But despite this negative understanding of clinginess, it actually comes from a place of insecurity and wanting to love and be loved.
They wait several days to text you back
If they wait several days to answer you back, then you're texting too much. Whatever their reason for the delayed response, being overly anxious and continuing to text when it isn't reciprocated makes you appear needy and desperate.
A clingy partner stalks you
— having a life without them. Attentive partners have what's called "secure attachment," and don't need to be around their partner all the time or creep up into their space when they're out with friends (via Psychology Today).
Individuals with an anxious attachment style are characterized with: Being clingy. Having an intensely persistent and hypervigilant alertness towards their partner's actions or inactions.
Clingy is needy, and obsessive is being unhinged about someone, and can result in extreme jealousy.
One of the most common behaviors that can make a woman appear desperate is being too eager for attention from men. This could include talking about your love life incessantly or even trying too hard to impress someone with your looks or behavior.
If you describe someone as clingy, you mean that they become very attached to people and depend on them too much. A very clingy child can drive a parent to distraction. Clingy clothes fit tightly round your body.
Appearing emotionally attached but lacking empathy: An emotionally needy person can be very selfish because they only cling to others or appear to need them to make themselves feel better. Clinginess is not flattering. It is unstable and needy behavior.