INFJs are energized by working creatively towards a future vision or goal. In turn, they are drained by being in noisy, disorganized environments where they face frequent interruptions to their thoughts and musings. It's especially bad if they are in an environment where there is frequent conflict.
INFJs are very aware of other people's moods and feelings and can feel them themselves, leading them to be exhausted. Because they feel so misunderstood, INFJs don't often share their deep feelings with others.
#2 – They're Constantly Tired
When they're depressed or uninspired, they feel fatigued and drained. INFJs without a vision for the future feel listless and apathetic, as if they're lost in a fog and unable to find a light to guide them home.
Too many details or other sensory stimuli can provoke a stress reaction in INFJs, especially when you feel uncertain about a situation. Unexpected environments, events or interruptions unsettle you greatly since you are forced to focus on immediate, sensory details rather than relying on your intuition.
INFJs are strong individuals and they prize themselves upon being able to see things in a different light. They believe in them with a conviction that can't be matched, so rejecting those beliefs is direct rejection of them.
Perhaps the most telling sign of burnout is a dwindling passion for your job, or doubt about whether this is the job for you. When you have become entirely spent, the amount of energy you can dedicate to your job starts to dwindle. When INFJs can't give their 100 percent, we start second-guessing our decisions.
INFJ: Open-mindedness
INFJs seek someone who is open-minded and willing to explore different ways of looking at the world. That's what really turns them on.
Usually, they will get more withdrawn and stuck in their head when they're angry. They might try to shut off noise, lights, or find a room they can hide away in to deal with their thoughts and charged emotions. Some INFJs shut down and stop talking and reacting, trying to sort out their thoughts inside.
In my experience as an MBTI® practitioner, one of the most common struggles I hear from INFJs is the struggle of being misunderstood. INFJs feel misunderstood in their external environment and even by themselves.
Worst Matches for an INFJ
For these reasons, the two worst potential matches for an INFJ are the energetic and unemotional ESTP and the always curious and firmly grounded ISTP. Relationships with both types of personalities leave the INFJ feeling unfulfilled and disconnected from their partners.
INFJs are extremely observant, and it's easy for us to see all the many ways in which we don't fit in with the groups around us. What is much more confusing though, is why we don't fit in. This leads most INFJ personality types to feel alone, misunderstood, rejected, or weird (and not in a good way).
Their perfectionism can drive others away.
INFJs are perfectionists. Their compulsion for perfection can be harmful to the INFJ themselves, but it can also push people away.
The INFJ. Unhealthy INFJs tend to play ego-defensive survival games when they feel threatened, insecure, or forced to conform. During these phases they tend to shut out emotions and become much more robotic in their actions and decisions.
As introverts, the key way that INFJs recharge is through alone time. They find happiness within themselves, but they can't do so if they're distracted by other people and energies around them.
INFJs ranked as having low dominance according to the CPI™ tool. Since the traits linked with low-dominance were being quiet, cautious, or hesitant to take action, this makes sense. INFJs tend to be on the quiet side, and they also tend to be extremely independent.
INFJs are no exception to this rule, and when they become overly stressed they may display a dark side that includes angry outbursts, obsessive worrying, perfectionism, or even depression. When INFJs first encounter stress, they start to behave very true-to-type.
Kindness. As sensitive personalities, INFJs feel attracted to people who show kindness towards others. Extraverted Feeling is their auxiliary function, which means INFJs try to connect in a gentle way, and appreciate those who can do the same. Most INFJs also strive to make a positive impact on the world.
INFJs also feel embarrassed when they cry in front of others or react emotionally to criticism. They also experience “second-hand embarrassment”. This occurs when they empathize too strongly with someone who has done something awkward or is embarrassing themselves.
As INFJs, our Introverted Intuition coupled with our judging nature makes us prone to having high expectations for ourselves, which means we often feel like we're failing.
Yes, the INFJ could be withdrawing from you because they realize they aren't really interested in you in that way. They may want to remain friends, but they're afraid to say those words out loud, in case they lose a relationship with you completely.
ENFJ – Being Alone
Prolonged bouts of alone time can make ENFJs feel empty and uninspired. “My mind wanders to dark places if I'm alone for too long. Being around people is a huge comfort and something I couldn't stand to be without for an extended period of time.”
Because of our passionate need for meaningful connection, we INFJs can get jealous easily when we see other people connecting and having fun. We might compare ourselves to them, or worse yet, when someone close to us has friends of their own, we might pull away, feeling unwanted and pathetic.