A flirtationship is a hybrid of the words “flirtation” and “friendship.” Basically, it's a relationship between two friends who flirt for fun. People get into flirtationships with their friends, classmates, coworkers, and anybody they regularly see and flirt with.
Sometimes, flirtatious friendships are just fun and entertaining, and each person has a keen awareness that the relationship would never go further, sex therapist Holly Richmond said. “People like to feel wanted, to feel desired, and having a flirtatious friend can elicit those emotions,” she explained.
Being kind, being polite, being engaged in conversation — these are all ways of flirting. As soon as you cross over to overt physical compliments and stronger words, you run the risk of coming on too strong.”
If you've been flirting with a coworker or friend for months but it's all been surface-level conversations, you're fine—flirt away. But "when you begin to go to that person for emotional support and connection, rather than your partner, you have crossed the line from flirting to emotional cheating," says Orbuch.
They are interested in what you have to say and ask you lots of questions. They laugh at your jokes, even the lame ones. They initiate physical contact. They try to find space where you can talk more privately (this does not always mean sex, but it often means they wish for more quality time with you).
Clues to spot flirting are body language, such as smiling, leaning forward, and touching, and verbal cues such as compliments or references to being available. You can also ask yourself if the person's behavior is consistent over time and whether they act differently with you than they do with others.
Generally speaking, friendly touches are light and brief. Flirty touches are longer, and on places that a friend wouldn't normally touch.
Deliberately Touching Someone
Yet, frequently and purposely touching someone in a provocative way–like caressing their hand or giving them a tight and lingering hug–is inappropriate flirting, and implies a romantic/sexual interest, particularly when there's attraction between either party.
Innocent flirting is a lighthearted and playful form of social interaction that involves casual, friendly banter, compliments, and teasing without any serious intent or expectation to pursue a romantic or sexual relationship.
Platonic flirting is flirting with a platonic friend, with no intention of romance, and no desire for sex. You might find yourself giving your platonic friend compliments, touching their arm, or giggling with them. This can be natural and harmless, as long as both parties feel comfortable.
Staying friends with someone after developing real romantic feelings for them can be hard. However, many people have successfully remained friends after unrequited love confessions. Although it's common for two people not to be able to get past potential awkwardness, it can still be possible for some.
Flirting can signal that they are attracted to you, or it could mean that they are a naturally flirtatious person. You'll need to distinguish what their flirting means, but you have the benefit of knowing their personality already. Look for signs of flirting like: They compliment you frequently.
Do platonic friends flirt? This is another one where it really depends on the people involved. Some people are naturally flirtatious and use it as a way to bond with people, whereas other people only flirt if they're intending to find a spouse, house, and four kids. So, it really comes down to comfort levels.
Both people who are being friendly and those who are flirting will pick your brain and ask questions. But if someone is truly flirting, you might be notice a deeper “agenda” that seems to suggest they want to know you better, Tina B. Tessina, PhD, psychotherapist and author, tells Bustle.
Harmless Flirting
This can mean buying a drink in a social setting, freely giving compliments, side arm hugs or other non-sexual touches, a platonic friendship. The term “harmless” is only applicable if you are willing to disclose this behavior (without shame or concern) to your partner.
Playful: Seeing the goal of flirting as fun (rather than trying to start a relationship) and just having a good time laughing, joking, and teasing.
Flirting isn't: A way to convince someone to like/date/hook up with you. Putting on a persona, lying to another person, or only being nice to get your way isn't flirting. That's called manipulation.
Flirty: When a person is flirting with you, they might make prolonged eye contact with you. They will look deep into your eyes and will stare at you till you become slightly self-conscious. Friendly: If they are simply being friendly, they will look at you equal amounts of time as they look at others.
If Your Conversations Feel Deep & Personal, They Might Be Flirting. Barrett says you should also pay attention to the nature of your conversations. “Friendliness is more surface-level, but a flirter wants to go deeper and get more personal, finding out about your life, your feelings, your past," he explains.
In his book he examines five key styles: polite, playful, sincere, and traditional. Take the quiz here to see which one you are. There is no right or wrong way to flirt, but according to author Jeffrey Hall there are five different styles.