A selfish partner is someone who constantly puts their needs and desires above those of their partner. They prioritize personal gain without considering the impact on the relationship. Such individuals may be insensitive to their partner's feelings and dismissive of their wants.
You're Always Taking, But Never Giving Back
"Your relationship can feel unbalanced. Giving and receiving are important for both people in the relationship. If you are always taking and not giving back, this is a sign of selfishness," says Opperman.
Being selfish in a relationship means that you consistently put yourself first, even if it hurts the other person. Related Reading: How to Communicate Your Needs in a Relationship?
But the only thing that's telling you is that you've given your heart to the wrong person because in a situation where it is reciprocated, both people will be willing to give to the other. For this reason, selfish people can never truly love another, because they will be less willing to compromise.
The common consequence of being selfish is that it creates an unhealthy one-sided relationship dynamic. In addition, our partners may start to feel resentful or disappointed by the relationship. It's not uncommon for relationships to end because of selfishness.
In contrast to this, selfish love is where one focuses on their own self even when loving someone. By asking for something in return, doing something conditionally or only when it would benefit you more than the other person, one exhibits the characteristics of selfish love.
If both partners are giving equally, the relationship will work. But if your partner takes you for granted or doesn't respect you, that means trouble. Sometimes this is a result of relationship stressors that can be fixed. If you feel deeply that your partner no longer values you, it could be time to leave.
A selfish person who lacks empathy might not hesitate to hurt others if it means getting what they want. They will often lie or cheat to advance their objectives. Watch out for these types of people; they are capable of great destruction – and feel next to no guilt!
People who are viewed as selfish put their needs before the needs of others and don't seem to care much for anyone's feelings but their own.
Psychology. Lack of empathy has been seen as one of the roots of selfishness, extending as far as the cold manipulation of the psychopath.
Rana Khan, a registered psychotherapist in Toronto, says selfishness becomes toxic when it begins to negatively impact those close relationships. “More often than not, the best way to evaluate/check yourself is the opinion that other people hold of us and how they are impacted by our behaviour,” he said.
Selfish people may prioritize their own petty needs above the significant needs of others. For example, a person is exhibiting selfishness when he or she steals money from their mother to buy a comic book. Some mental health problems can contribute to the development of selfishness.
Prioritizes himself
Self-absorption is but one of the many selfish husband signs. He never thinks about your well-being or comfort. Their world revolves around one person: themselves. He will not ask you about your likes, dislikes in terms of decisions, big or small.
If someone is self-centered, they usually don't reciprocate the effort you put into the relationship. They may also disregard rules, believing that rules and guidelines don't apply to them. To cope with a selfish person, you can set boundaries, tell them how you feel, or cut them off.
The key difference between selfish and self centered is that selfish people lack concern for others, whereas self centered people are excessively interested in themselves. Generally, both qualities induce individuals to think only of themselves by prioritizing themselves and their needs by ignoring that of others.
What Causes Selfishness? According to mental health experts, selfishness stems from genetic predispositions and behavior learned during childhood development from family members. Mental health issues such as Narcissistic Personality Disorder, depression, and anxiety can lead to selfishness.
Like Neapolitan ice cream, selfishness has three specific flavors—and only two of them are good. According to Psychology Today, there are three distinct types of selfish actions: the good, the bad, and the neutral.
Overly controlling behavior is a common red flag in relationships. People that try to control your movements, decisions, or beliefs are more concerned about what they want than what is best for you. If a guy or girl tries to control what you wear or where you go, this could be a red flag.
The most destructive relationship behaviours are those the Gottmann Institute has deemed the 'Four Horsemen' – criticism, defensiveness, contempt (eye-rolling, disgust, dismissal or ridiculing), stonewalling, and the silent treatment. Of these, contempt has been shown to be the greatest predictor of divorce.
New research shows that relationships are actually more vulnerable to demise far sooner than the dreaded seven year itch. The most common time for a couple to split is right around the two year mark. By then, you've most likely seen everything about your partner—their best and their worst physically and emotionally.
Selfishness is defined as placing concern with oneself or one's own interests, benefits or welfare above the well-being or regardless of the interests of others. Synonyms include egocentric, parsimonious, self-centered, self-indulgent, self-interested, self-seeking, wrapped up in oneself.