Insecure attachment is characterized by a lack of trust and a lack of a secure base. People with an insecure style may behave in anxious, ambivalent, or unpredictable ways. When adults with secure attachments look back on their childhood, they usually feel that someone reliable was always available to them.
Those with insecure attachment styles, on the other hand, may tend to become needy or clingy in their closest relationships, behave in selfish or manipulative ways when feeling vulnerable, or simply shy away from intimacy altogether.
Definitions. Insecure attachment : An individual relationship can be insecure when it contains elements of mistrust together with anxious or avoidant elements and lacks a secure base. It is considered a dysfunctional relationship.
Secure attachment is associated with low anxiety and low avoidance. Insecure attachment includes those low on anxiety but high on avoidance (avoidant attachment) and those high on anxiety and low on avoidance (anxious attachment).
Infants with insecure/avoidant attachment fail to greet and/or approach, appear oblivious to their caregiver's return and remain focused on toys, essentially avoiding the caregiver, which occurs in 23% of the general population (9).
Possible Causes of Insecure Attachment
On the upbringing side, it's believed that attachment styles may stem from early childhood relationships 2 with caregivers. If a caregiver were inconsistent, emotionally unavailable, or even dangerous, the child would likely develop an insecure attachment style.
"An individual who has an insecure attachment to another typically feels anxious about the relationship and whether or not their own needs or desires can be met by the other person," holistic psychologist Nicole Lippman-Barile, Ph. D., says. "They may expect the person to abandon them or hurt them in some way."
Healthy attachment occurs when the caregiver provides comfort, affection, and basic needs on a regular basis and with consistency. Poor attachment, inappropriate responses to a baby's distress, lack of affection, abusive behaviors, and the absence of the caregiver can all cause a traumatic experience for the child.
Researchers Philip Shaver and Cindy Hazan, who looked at adult relationships through the lens of childhood attachment styles, estimate that approximately 40 percent of people have an insecure attachment style of one type or another.
Follow through on any promises or commitments you make. Show them that their feelings of abandonment are not warranted. Be consistent in giving them attention and adhering to plans. Given their history of being disappointed, it's important to build and sustain trust with anxiously attached individuals.
People with a disorganized attachment style pursue a loving relationship but then detach or lash out at a partner who gives them that love. It's the rarest and the most extreme form of insecure attachment as it results from very specific kinds of trauma.
Known as disorganized attachment style in adulthood, the fearful avoidant attachment style is thought to be the most difficult. Sadly, this insecure attachment style is often seen in children that have experienced trauma or abuse.
Healthy attachments with other people are essential to your mental health. If you live with an insecure attachment style, you may find relationships difficult and have other challenges, such as anxiety, depression, or low self-esteem.
Yet, attachment disorders and ADHD are strongly linked, meaning that an insecure attachment style has the potential to worsen ADHD symptoms – even in adulthood.
Although it is never too late to treat and repair attachment issues, the earlier you spot the symptoms of insecure attachment and take steps to repair them, the better. Caught in infancy before they become more serious problems, attachment difficulties are often easy to correct with the right help and support.
Masculinity is mostly linked to insecure/dismissing attachment, whereas femininity is linked to insecure/fearful-preoccupied attachment.
Insecure ambivalent attachment to a caregiver may cause a child to have a hard time exploring new places, seeming more worried about where their parent is. However, when their parent returns, that child still may not appear to be comforted enough to explore. Their parent's presence doesn't seem to soothe them entirely.
Babies with a 'Difficult' temperament (those who eat and sleep irregularly and who reject new experiences) are likely to have insecure-ambivalent attachments. In conclusion, the most complete explanation of why children develop different attachment types would be an interactionist theory.