From intimacy issues, mistrust, a lack of communication to abuse, lack of emotional availability to financial burden and the adverse effects on young children; alcohol abuse in a romantic relationship can have severe effects on both partners, their children, and other family members.
However your relationship began or how your partner's drinking may have started , today it's clear: your partner is an alcoholic and you're wondering if your relationship with them will survive. The hard truth is that it is impossible to have a healthy relationship with someone who is dependent upon drugs or alcohol.
While you may think you're being affected by whether or not you and your partner drink the same amount, you really aren't. How much one person chooses to drink has nothing to do with you or anyone else — unless, of course, it's affecting your harmony as a couple.
Being in love with an alcoholic can truly feel like the rock bottom of the messiest of relationships. You are constantly torn between being there for them and looking after your own needs. This tussle of whether to stay and fight their fight or move on and reclaim your life can be overbearing.
The Connection Between Alcohol & Personality Changes
People tend to become more withdrawn, irritable, and isolated when they drink. They might become so preoccupied with drinking (or recovering from drinking) that they neglect relationships, work, and other essential life responsibilities.
They may choose to skip out on alcohol-free events to stay home and drink. They may also choose to go out and drink instead. Alternatively, they may suggest a change of plans which involve alcohol. When you do go out together, they may seem anxious to begin drinking.
The personality traits most often found to be related to excessive alcohol consumption are impulsivity/disinhibition and neuroticism/negative affectivity, whereas the significance of other personality characteristics such as extraversion/ sociability remains inconclusive (10, 28-29).
Alcoholism is linked to codependency in relationships as well as abusive behavior both verbally and physically. Deterioration in married or unmarried couples often stems from arguments, financial troubles, and acts of infidelity or, worse, domestic violence.
Many alcoholics will suffer from low self-esteem, especially in the early days. They may feel unworthy and not good enough, which can affect their ability to be intimate with their partner. This low self-esteem can cause erectile dysfunction in men and decrease sexual desire in both sexes.
Lack of Intimacy
Your partner's alcohol use can damage these aspects and cause you to lose trust in the relationship. Parts of intimacy affected by alcohol addiction can include: Stability: People with addiction may opt to drink and go to bars rather than be with loved ones, causing a lack of relationship stability.
Identify and stop enabling behaviors that allow him to keep drinking, learn more about alcohol use disorder, have a calm but serious talk with your spouse, and if necessary, have a professionally-guided intervention and provide options for addiction treatment that he can start immediately.
Dating an alcoholic can also put you at physical risk of violence, injuries, and accidents. An alcoholic person may indulge in unsafe sexual practices under the influence and put you at risk too. Another risk of a romantic involvement with an alcoholic person is codependency.
Someone with King Baby Syndrome thinks of themselves as the center of the universe. They are “kings” in the sense that they are narcissistic and boss others around. They are also “babies” in the sense that they long for immediate gratification. An infant or toddler can expect others to meet their needs quickly.
Irritability is a sign of alcohol addiction
If your partner becomes irritable and frustrated at the prospect of not being able to drink, it's a classic sign that you're dating an alcoholic. In some cases, this may even trigger angry outbursts or make you see a dark side to them that you didn't even know existed.
Alcohol dependent persons rarely present secure connection to others and more often manifest mistrust in interpersonal relationships and avoid closeness and intimacy.
More specifically, though traits related to impulsivity/disinhibition appear to demonstrate the most robust and consistent relation with alcohol involvement, all Five-Factor traits (i.e., openness to experience, conscientiousness, extraversion, agreeableness, neuroticism) have been shown to correspond, with varying ...
A UCSF study of a heavy drinkers found that drinking alcohol triggers the release of natural opiate-like endorphins in the pleasure and reward areas of the brain.
High blood pressure, heart disease, stroke, liver disease, and digestive problems. Cancer of the breast, mouth, throat, esophagus, voice box, liver, colon, and rectum. Weakening of the immune system, increasing the chances of getting sick. Learning and memory problems, including dementia and poor school performance.
Alcohol abuse can cause people to develop narcissistic personality disorder as they become defensive about their substance use and whether they have an addiction.
Axis I disorders commonly associated with alcoholism include bipolar disorder, certain anxiety disorders (e.g., social phobia, panic disorder, and post–traumatic stress disorder [PTSD]), schizophrenia, and major depression (Helzer and Przybeck 1988; Kessler et al. 1997).