Oldest child syndrome comprises the behavioral changes exhibited by your firstborn after the birth of their younger sibling. They may show dominating tendencies, develop an unhealthy competitive attitude, and become controlling.
“Firstborn children can be goal-oriented, outspoken, stubborn, independent, and perfectionistic,” Smelser says, and when you look at the way firstborns are nurtured, it starts to make sense why. “These traits are often reinforced by parents through their interactions with the child,” she says.
Spend individual time – Each parent should seek out the undivided attention of the oldest child in a casual, friendly way. Oldest children need the chance to talk with parents without feeling drilled on their homework or other responsibilities, plans for their future or household chores.
This is eldest daughter syndrome: the unofficial, unpaid role of managing the family dynamic, foisted upon women from a young age because they have the emotional intelligence and age advantage — or rather, disadvantage.
Oldest Child - “The Achiever”
As a result, firstborn children tend to be responsible, well-behaved, and possess strong leadership qualities. The oldest children are often held to a higher standard than the later-borns. They are the first of everything, and their parents are going through it for the first time, too.
As the oldest daughter enters adulthood, she may experience sadness and depression without identifying a reason for either. This state can lead to post-traumatic stress disorder, as well as personality disorders and free-floating anxiety.”
Eldest daughter syndrome is the burden felt by oldest daughters because they're given too many adult responsibilities in their family before they're ready. Eldest daughter syndrome can make women feel overburdened, stressed out, and constantly responsible for others.
Obsession, desire for perfection, high self-esteem, or pressure to meet parents' expectations are common signs of oldest child syndrome. Children with oldest child syndrome could show dominance and act as second parents to siblings.
Previous studies in the US have indicated that first-born adolescents are more likely to have higher self-esteem than other siblings and only children (18), whereas middle-born adolescent males are found to have lower self-esteem (19).
The first born may experience certain emotions differently than the middle and youngest child or visa versa. According to Adler, the first born is more susceptible to depression because of high expectations of parents and suddenly losing the attention due to another sibling being born.
No matter how old you are, you're expected to take more responsibility, even when you're a very young person yourself. That's one reason that oldest children are often described as responsible, sensitive, perfectionistic, and a bit more anxious than their siblings.
Researchers have found a correlation between risk-taking and being the last-born sibling.
“Parents are definitely harder on their firstborn children,” says Dr. Fran Walfish, Psy. D., a child-and-family psychotherapist and author of The Self-Aware Parent. “In a way, the firstborn child is a guinea pig — practiced on.
Researchers have found that the baby of the family is often slimmer and less prone to illness. As a result, younger siblings can expect to live longer than their older brothers and sisters.
First-born kids tend to be leaders, like CEOS and founders, and are more likely to achieve traditional success. Middle-born children often embody a mix of the traits of older and younger siblings, and they're very relationship-focused.
The firstborn
Stereotype: Natural leader, ambitious, responsible. Why it's true: The eldest, for a while, has no competition for time (or books or baby banter) with Mom and Dad. “There's a benefit to all of that undiluted attention.
Golden child syndrome, or being a “golden child,” is a term typically used by family, and most often by parents, to refer to a child in the family that's regarded as exceptional in some way. The golden child is expected to be extraordinary at everything, not make mistakes, and essentially be “perfect.”
They may also struggle with people-pleasing, perfectionism, and fear of failure; are often inflexible, and take on more responsibility than they should. “Children with the firstborn syndrome often show dominance and act as second parents to siblings and that is not necessarily a bad thing.
The psychologist Alfred Adler developed the family order theory, which says that the order in which a child is born shapes their development and personality. The oldest child is seen as the leader, and the child who may experience a stricter upbringing compared to their other siblings.
Most unresolved childhood trauma affects self-esteem and creates anxiety. Did you suffer a serious childhood illness? If so, you were likely isolated at home or hospitalized. This meant being removed from normal social activities and you probably felt lonely, maybe even worried about being different.
Focus Area. Trauma and adversity in childhood raise the risk of numerous health problems such as diabetes, heart disease, cancer, and mental illness in adulthood.
These findings may seem surprising if you've never had an 8-year-old, but there are some reasons a child's eighth year can be especially challenging from a parent's perspective. Eight-year-olds can be stubborn, slamming doors and rolling their eyes, in their attempts to establish their independence and individuality.
Firstborns tend to possess psychological characteristics related to leadership, including responsibility, creativity, obedience and dominance. They are also more likely to have higher academic abilities and levels of intelligence than their younger siblings.
While the youngest sibling is usually the funniest kid, mom and dad favor the youngest for a reason that might surprise you. According to a new study conducted by Brigham Young University's School of Family Life, the youngest sibling of the family tends to be mom and dad's favorite child because of perception.