Insecure people need to become conscious of these vulnerabilities so they can change them. Insecure people spend lots of time trying to make others happy or preventing their unhappiness. Instead they need to allow others to be accountable for themselves and take ownership over their own happiness.
“Some of the most common insecurities and relationships include emotional insecurity, attachment insecurity, physical insecurity, financial insecurity, professional insecurity, and social insecurity,” explains LaTonya P.
Insecurity may stem from a traumatic event, crisis such as divorce or bankruptcy, or a loss. It can also result from one's environment, as unpredictability or upset in daily life can cause anxiety and insecurity about ordinary, routine events.
The kind of childhood you had, past traumas, recent experiences of failure or rejection, loneliness, social anxiety, negative beliefs about yourself, perfectionism, or having a critical parent or partner can all contribute to insecurity.
Toxic people are often insecure people. They tend to make themselves feel or seem better than others by talking badly about them rather than taking concrete actions to develop their skills. Toxic people feel entitled to judge others, their actions, decisions, and lifestyles.
Insecure people often use criticism of others as a way to feel better about themselves. See, people who are insecure consistently feel bad about themselves. And often, they don't know how to feel better in a healthy or productive way. So they often resort to criticizing others.
Insecure people feel a constant need to validate their worth through others' opinions. They try to seek others' approval over their personality or work. They look for likes, comments and compliments from people and only feel happy when others acknowledge them.
People with a secure attachment style may be more likely to trust others and forgive mistakes. Those with insecure attachment styles, on the other hand, struggle more with trust and are more likely to experience jealousy and anxiety in relationships.
Insecurity fuels a lack of emotional confidence and security, which can lead to major issues in a relationship. It's also worth noting that this is not the same thing as a lack of trust. "You may have all the trust in the world that your partner isn't going to cheat on you but still feel insecure," says Jeney.
Self-worth is another factor that affects trust. If you are insecure and don't value yourself highly, you are likely to pick relationships that confirm your negative self-view. And being in a relationship with someone who doesn't value you will lead to repeated breaches of trust.
They are overly concerned about what others think of them. They never express a firm opinion. They suffer from a chronic inability to make decisions, even when the choices have little consequence. They frequently try to change the direction of projects and meetings.
The fear of being socially judged is one of the most common forms of insecurity. Some people feel self-conscious, anxious, and fearful when in front of others. It doesn't matter whether it's a group of colleagues or family members. This can extend to even the smallest of social encounters like a date.
A root fear: Overthinking stems from a particular insecurity or root fear. This insecurity may be from childhood, a past relationship, or general low self-esteem or trust issues.
Having confidence in what you believe is essential in business. However, when someone gets defensive about their idea or point of view, it is usually a clear sign of insecurity. Defensiveness occurs if we know we aren't comfortable with what we are saying or doing.
Meeting with a therapist is a great way to work through insecure feelings, learn where they come from, and understand how to heal. Regardless of whether your insecurity is more general, relationship focused, or work related, therapy can help you sort through difficult emotions and learn new coping mechanisms.
Being in healthy relationships with insecure people can be very difficult. Few things are sadder than loving someone who doesn't love themselves, mostly because they simply can't appreciate all of the truly amazing qualities that made you fall in love with them in the first place.
Key points. Red flags in a relationship are intuitive indicators that something needs to be questioned. Relationship red flags include feelings of insecurity and negative feedback from one's friends and family.