For patients diagnosed with adult ADHD there tends to be a “honeymoon period”, where they are really happy with treatment. They are excited and like 'wow I feel great' / 'this is so much better'.
For many people affected by ADHD, key symptoms like inattention, forgetfulness, and disorganization negatively affect their relationships. The partners without ADHD can misinterpret their partners' intentions, resulting in increased frustration and resentment.
ADHD is not the kiss of death. The condition, alone, can't make or break a romantic relationship. But, if symptoms of attention deficit disorder (ADHD or ADD) are not properly acknowledged, treated, and accepted, they can — and often do — create or exacerbate marital tensions.
For those of us with ADHD, traits like rejection sensitive dysphoria, big feelings, and obsessive thinking prolong and worsen the pain of a breakup. After a heavy dose of heartache, I'm here to share my tips for moving on. Breakups cut deep in the ADHD heart.
Examples of common ADHD texting challenges:
Forgetting to check or reply to messages. Perfectionism; overthinking your texts, sometimes erasing them completely. Misinterpreting tone of voice (sarcasm, joking, etc.) General social anxiety.
Those with ADHD will often have difficulty “reading between the lines” or understanding subtext. It is difficult enough for most to attend to the text of conversations without the additional strain of needing to be aware of the subtext and what the person really means .
If that felt like a personal call-out, you're not alone. It's a common ADHD experience that I call 'involuntary ghosting' - a phenomenon that describes the disappearing act that happens when ADHDers forget to respond to texts.
ADHD needs novelty to help the brain work, so it can feel bored really easily – and, conversely, if the person really enjoys something, it can allow them to become totally absorbed and lose track of time, leaving their partners feeling unimportant, not valued, disrespected or simply unloved.
Lack of consistency. Toxic communication — such as contempt, criticism, and sarcasm. Controlling behavior and distrust. Abusive — this is also inclusive of emotionally abusive behaviors, such as gaslighting, love bombing, breadcrumbing etc.
Some people with ADD/ADHD also have trouble maintaining everyday relationships. They often quickly become bored with their romantic partner. When the rush of new love wears off, boredom sets in, they end the relationship and seek out someone new.
Research shows that some people with ADHD often have trouble identifying and expressing their feelings and emotions, which can result in problems in their social life and relationship.
It's true: Attention deficit disorder (ADHD or ADD) has strained more than a few romantic relationships. Equally true (though less recognized) is the fact that partners with ADHD are among the most loyal, generous, engaged, and genuinely fun people you could meet.
This wonderful high is even more pronounced when you have ADHD because there is an increased amount of dopamine released in your brain. Dopamine is the feel good neurotransmitter that is known to be low in ADHD brains. Because of this happy feeling, ADHD adults can be serial daters. They love to be loved.
Symptoms of ADHD that can cause relationship problems
If you have ADHD, you may zone out during conversations, which can make your partner feel ignored and devalued. You may also miss important details or mindlessly agree to something you don't remember later, which can be frustrating to your loved one.
Similarly, people with ADHD can also experience 'meltdowns' more commonly than others, which is where emotions build up so extremely that someone acts out, often crying, angering, laughing, yelling and moving all at once, driven by many different emotions at once – this essentially resembles a child tantrum and can ...
When we feel like we are constantly unable to do tasks asked of us, it can lead to feelings of anxiety and worthlessness, which can lead to a meltdown, too. Meltdowns may occur when deep breaths and time-outs aren't working and angry outbursts are imminent ? .
It's a real thing, called misophonia — the dislike or even hatred of small, routine sounds, such as someone chewing, slurping, yawning, or breathing. It's often an ADHD comorbidity. Similar to ADHD itself, misophonia is not something we can just get over if only we tried harder.
Because of this internal restlessness, many adults with ADHD have a hard time maintaining relationships. As relationships become more comfortable and predictable, you may feel like you are becoming more and more restless or distracted from things outside of the relationship.
A rush of biochemical euphoria comes with “new love.” Those of us with ADHD often hyperfocus on romance, not just for the sake of romance, but also to increase those pleasure-producing neurotransmitters (dopamine) that are in short supply in our brains. Highly charged emotions are not part of lasting love.
Attention deficit hyperactivity disorder (ADHD) can impact intimacy in marriage. Some challenges surrounding ADHD and sex may include a lack of impulse control or sensory issues. Since folks with ADHD can experience inattention, a lack of focus during intimacy may cause a partner to feel as though they're not desired.
Many people with ADHD tend to talk faster than others, too, which can lead to them inadvertently cutting off others while speaking.
For many people with ADHD, their speech, language, and communication skills are significantly affected. Individuals with ADHD are at a higher risk of developing articulation disorders, issues with speech fluency, and a decrease in the overall quality and tone of their speaking voice.