A toxic relationship is often characterized by repeated, mutually destructive modes of relating between a couple. These patterns can involve jealousy, possessiveness, dominance, manipulation, desperation, selfishness or rejection.
The role models we grow up with are often the first source
We tend to repeat toxic relationships with partners, friends, coworkers, and the like because of the role models we received as a child. The more aware we become of those patterns, the less likely we will continue seeking and repeating them unconsciously.
Fundamentally, toxic relationship behaviors are the result of a lack of empathy. Whether that be demanding your partner live up to your expectations, or refusing to see things from their perspective, toxic behavior often represents an inability to feel genuine understanding and compassion for the other person.
A toxic person is anyone whose behavior adds negativity and upset to your life. Many times, people who are toxic are dealing with their own stresses and traumas. To do this, they act in ways that don't present them in the best light and usually upset others along the way.
Learn to forgive yourself
Toxic relationships will make you feel like it was all your fault. But once it ends, you gradually learn how to forgive yourself and tell yourself that it's okay to fail. It's more important to rise after.
Yes, toxic relationships can change. But that comes with a very big if. A toxic relationship can change if and only if both partners are equally committed to overcoming it with lots of open communication, honesty, self-reflection, and possibly professional help, individually and together.
Gaslighting
Veasley says gaslighting is one of the most common forms of emotional manipulation and a toxic behavior you shouldn't tolerate. It's a good idea to identify ways to deal with gaslighting.
People with toxic traits know they have them
It's natural to assume someone's bad behavior is a conscious choice. But many people with toxic traits don't realize that their behavior impacts others. You may have toxic traits that you don't know about. Some toxic traits, like absolutism, manifest subtly.
Controlling. One of the most dangerous traits of a toxic person is controlling behavior. They may try to restrict you from contacting your friends or family, or limit resources like transportation or access to money to restrict your ability to interact with the world around you.
If you've addressed toxic behavior with the person exhibiting it and they have taken it to heart, it's possible for toxic people to change. “Toxic people can absolutely change,” Kennedy says, “however they must see their part in the problem before they are likely to find the motivation to do so.”
Fear of conflict.
Usually, the longer you've been with someone, the more conflicted the process is. It is a sad reality that many men (and women) stay in unfulfilling relationships month after month, year after year, because they fear the pain involved in breaking up and moving on.
Some of the physical side effects of a toxic relationship are disrupted sleep, poor nutrition, digestive issues, muscle tightness, fatigue/feeling constantly worn down, and immunity issues (getting ill more often).
Unhealthy relationships may contribute to a toxic social environment that can lead to stress, depression, anxiety, and even suicide. It is important to recognize the warning signs and find ways to reduce or avoid relational toxicity. This is especially true for people recovering from a history of substance abuse.
What is a Toxic Person? One of the signs of a toxic person is someone who is both manipulative and abusive. If you haven't heard the term gaslighting, it's often used in toxic friendships and relationships where someone makes you question your own sanity and basically everything you've ever known.
Toxic femininity refers to the adherence to the gender binary in order to receive conditional value in patriarchal societies. It is a concept that restricts women to being cooperative, passive, sexually submissive, gentle, and deriving their value from physical beauty while being pleasing to men.
Many people who behave in a toxic manner have been through trauma themselves, and instead of dealing with that trauma, these people start exhibiting toxic traits. These people usually don't know how to process trauma and stress in a healthy manner, so they end up being unpleasant around people.
No matter who it is, if your relationship is harming your mental health, the best decision you can make is to cut them out of your life. Toxic people can make you feel consumed by a negative outlook on yourself or isolate you from people who truly are good for you.
Things you should never tolerate in a relationship include not being cared about. After all, if that's the case, then what's the point of the relationship? Essentially, insults or hurtful comments about you, your job, goals, family, or anything else just don't come from a caring and loving partner.
What is gaslighting in a relationship? It's a form of psychological manipulation in which one person makes the other partner doubt his or her perceptions, experiences, memories, or understanding of events that happened.
Stashing—sometimes referred to as pocketing—is when one person in a relationship makes the conscious decision to hide the other person from his or her inner circle, and yes, that includes both in real life and on social media.