people gossip for a variety of reasons: To feel superior. Many people who are insecure about themselves find temporary relief in judging others. Knowing something that others don't can feel empowering, and sometimes, that's all an uncertain gossiper needs.
Thus far, research has, for example, shown that people were motivated to engage in gossip to bond with their group members, to entertain themselves, to exchange information, to vent emotions, and to maintain social order. These motives can be argued to be quite harmless, and even based on constructive tendencies.
Gossip comes from the Old English word god-sibb, or godparent. It was a term given to a woman's close female friend after the birth of her child, a word reflecting the powerful bond between them. But somewhere along the way, it gained a bad connotation.
Gossips are desperate and immature people. They need drama, love conflict and are so deeply unconfident they feel compelled to tell and spread false accusations and stories about others in order to feel a sense of superiority, or to be able to play the ultimate role of the victim.
Gossiping can also bring on exhaustion, anxiety, or depression. Experts also warn that gossiping can cause long-term physical and mental issues like panic attacks, guilt, and in extreme cases, post-traumatic stress disorder. So how do you break the cycle?
Gossiping, rumors, and badmouthing others is a one-sided way to handle or create conflict and it's incredibly toxic to culture and relationships. “Be the kind of person that stops gossip at the source - it's good for your reputation, and more importantly, it's good for your heart.”
Here are the primary reasons people engage in gossiping:
To bond with others. 42% of Millennials said that it builds workplace relationships. To vent. 44% said that office chatter relieves their work-based stress.
Sometimes, the main reason behind gossiping is envy and jealousy. When someone is envious of someone else, he might gossip about him in order to let people hate him.
Social scientists study positive, negative, and neutral forms of gossip.
Gossip drives social bonding and helps people learn.
Gossip perhaps then serves as a means of instrumental support, a problem focused coping method where the individual seeks social support through seeking information.
Definitions of gossiper. a person given to gossiping and divulging personal information about others. synonyms: gossip, gossipmonger, newsmonger, rumormonger, rumourmonger.
People who have been the subject of gossip have been shown to develop depression, anxiety, suicidal thoughts and eating disorders. Plus it is never just the person that is targeted that is affected. Family members and close friends will also feel the impact of the gossips tongue.
That ignorance prevents the subject from repairing his or her reputation; the subject doesn't know it is in need of repair in the first place. This is the fundamental moral tension in which gossip exists.
People gossip to feel like they belong to a group. They use speaking badly of people as a way to undermine rivals and establish alliances. When two people speak ill of a third, they form a kind of alliance. To gossip is to try to be inside of possible attacks of opponents.
Gossiping is a toxic behavior that breeds distrust and bitterness, so steer clear and avoid it. Before you share a hurtful story or critical thoughts, ask yourself why you are sharing these things with this particular person. Consider what is gained versus what is lost by gossiping.
Gossip, like teasing, can be harmless or, at its other extreme, malicious. As we shall see, much of what is written about the functions of gossip is positive, but gossip as verbal abuse is nonetheless a frequent reality. Verbal abuse generally takes the form of one person's saying something nasty to another person.
1) Neutral gossip: Talking about others solely to share information. It is generally harmless. 2) Negative gossip: Perhaps because of our insecurities or to increase our social standing, gossip is used as a weapon against others. It is sharing information that has potentially damaging effects on an absent third party.
Psychologists theorize that talking about other people is a habit that likely evolved as a safety mechanism. Thousands of years ago, when humans lived in small hunter-gather societies, people's survival depended on them knowing who they could trust and who they should avoid.
People who talk about you behind your back generally do so for one of the following reasons: They're angry with you about something but don't want to tell you to your face. They're jealous and want to take you down a peg but in a passive-aggressive way.
Say something polite yet direct, like: "Hey. I want you to know that I don't appreciate the things you've been saying about me. Please stop." Then, just walk away—this person doesn't deserve your time. Ignore any insults you hear as you're walking away.