Selfish behaviour, therefore, is not a lack of concern for others, but heightened anxiety for your own self. Driven by insecurity, a selfish person is forever grasping at more and more, in a desperate attempt to get close to their ideal version of themselves.
Some mental health problems can contribute to the development of selfishness. Many personality disorders, particularly antisocial personality disorder and narcissistic personality disorder, cause people to be so wrapped up in their own desires that they either do not notice or do not care about the needs of others.
Psychology. Lack of empathy has been seen as one of the roots of selfishness, extending as far as the cold manipulation of the psychopath.
Anxiety drives self-centeredness. It can be an existential insecurity regarding your inherent worth, value, safety, or wholeness. For some, it is a painful sense of a lack of integrity or authenticity.
Studies in behavior genetics show that around 40% of the willingness to help others is inherited. Those who do not help others help themselves, and anti-social behavior is inherited too. Depending on the genotypes of their parents, children may all be selfish, all altruistic or a mixture of both.
But it's a major coping tool for many different behaviors. Just because someone says you are being selfish, it doesn't necessarily mean you're actually doing anything wrong. What it probably means is that they want you to be doing something else—which might be right for them, but not necessarily for you.
Key points. Self-centered people are not necessarily narcissistic. They can still be empathic, while narcissists may simply see others as pawns. Many narcissists do not listen to others and jump on opportunities to showcase themselves.
Narcissistic personality disorder (NPD) is one of several personality disorders. People with this condition have an inflated idea of themselves and a need for lots of attention from other people. It's human nature to be selfish and boastful now and then, but true narcissists take it to an extreme.
Overview. Narcissistic personality disorder is a mental health condition in which people have an unreasonably high sense of their own importance. They need and seek too much attention and want people to admire them. People with this disorder may lack the ability to understand or care about the feelings of others.
Understand that, especially if they live with a mental health condition, there may not be anything you can do to change this person's behavior. The only person whose behavior you can control is yourself. It's up to you to decide whether or not you want to confront the person about their selfish behavior.
People who are viewed as selfish put their needs before the needs of others and don't seem to care much for anyone's feelings but their own.
According to Psychology Today, there are three distinct types of selfish actions: the good, the bad, and the neutral.
From this view, selfishness is perceived in ourselves and others when we detect a situation-specific desire to benefit the self that disregards others' desires and prevailing social expectations for the situation.
But Raymond stresses not all people know they're being selfish. “Selfish people aren't always aware of what effect their actions have on others and so it's important for anyone to make the selfish individual aware of what they're noticing about their actions, as well as the impact on themselves,” she said.
When people talk about toxic traits, they aren't usually talking about traits of a person — the term instead refers to a person's behavior. Behaviors can be characterized as “healthy” or “unhealthy.” Unhealthy, or toxic, behaviors include: Selfishness.
People with bipolar disorder often experience amplified emotions, and consequently struggle in their inter-personal relations. They can also appear self-absorbed, resistant to reason and don't seem to care how people around them feel.
While not one of the nine criteria for a diagnosis of borderline personality disorder (BPD), selfishness can be a symptom of the disease. Selfishness interferes with healthy relationships, worsens risky behavior and worsens addiction--all symptoms of BPD.
Greed and selfishness are often seen as negative character traits, but they can also be symptoms of ADHD. People with ADHD are more likely to be impulsive and act without thinking, which can lead to them being more selfish and greedy. It's important to remember that you are not alone in this.
At the end of a relationship, narcissists may become combative, passive-aggressive, hostile, and even more controlling. People with NPD often fail to understand other people's needs and values. They are hyper focused on their egos, but do not account for how their actions affect others.
Self-obsession means we are more prone to worry and mental health problems. Selfishness may make it easier for us to fall into traps like addiction. Our selfishness can mean we hurt others as we ruthlessly strive to satisfy our own needs. Self-centeredness can damage our reputation and lead to loneliness.