If you come across as too clingy or needy, it can be off-putting and make you look desperate. Additionally, if you are constantly checking your phone for messages from someone or trying to call and text them all the time, this can come across as desperate and make others think that you're not confident in yourself.
A person who is overtly desperate will usually do major grabs for attention — things like insulting people to get a rise out of them, being loud for no reason, and trying to get into peoples' personal space. They also tend to cling a bit.
Desperation is unattractive because of 2 main points: It screams “I am not a whole/complete person and I need someone/something to make me whole.” It advertises inadequacy and personal underdevelopment as if it was a feature, instead of a flaw (which it is).
Desperation consists of mental, emotional, and behavioral exhaustion. It means being tired of many accumulated disappointments and sadness. Written and verified by the psychologist Valeria Sabater. Desperation is a poison that turns off your hopes, motivations, and energy little by little.
Desperation, in fact, comes from de-spes which means lack of hope. Giving up on our hopes leads us to experience a quality of disconnection and meaninglessness that is far more frightening than any other painful experience we might go through.
Excessive Texting
For instance, texting non-stop could indicate that one partner is clingy and needy and feeling insecure in the relationship. While this is usually only harmful to the person doing the excessive texting, it can be smothering to the person on the receiving end.
1. Does it matter if you text first? It doesn't really matter who texts first, and texting first definitely doesn't mean that you're desperate, needy, or clingy. If the moment feels right and you have something interesting to say, by all means, go ahead and send that text.
Red Flags of Abusive Dating Relationships:
Other signs that you may be in an abusive relationship include a partner who belittles you or tries to control you, and feelings of self-loathing, helplessness, and desperation.
He is desperate for money/attention/work. After traveling all night, they were desperate for sleep. She was desperate to prove that she was right.
Some common synonyms of desperate are despairing, despondent, and hopeless. While all these words mean "having lost all or nearly all hope," desperate implies despair that prompts reckless action or violence in the face of defeat or frustration. Where would despairing be a reasonable alternative to desperate?
Clinginess is an act of resisting separation by holding tight or grasping onto something. In romantic relationships, the term is often used to describe someone who needs reassurance from their partners in a heavy-handed, frenzied, or even compulsive manner.
They always expect you to text back immediately
Then come the double, triple, quadruple texts, and the multiple phone calls. If this behavior is common — even when they know you're studying for an exam or working — then your partner is probably too clingy.
“Dry texters may suffer from social anxiety and have a difficult time communicating their thoughts and feelings via written word,” says psychotherapist Anita Astley, LMFT, author of the forthcoming book Unf*ck Your Life and Relationships.
Waiting 2–3 days or up to a week before reaching out gives him a chance to text you first once he realizes what he's missing. If you've waited more than a week and still haven't heard back from him, it might be time to move on. It's really hard when a guy flakes out on you, but there are other people out there for you!
How guys text when they like you can vary, (and dating tips for texting will vary depending who you ask), but texting every day is a sure sign that you are on the same page. If a guy texts you every day, even if you're the one initiating conversation, he is definitely interested. Remember to take hints as well.
“Bad at texting” is a red flag
If the person you're dating is “bad at texting” and they don't make an effort to communicate with you in other ways, they're probably not interested. … Or, they're giving the bare-minimum effort in order to keep you around without investing too much of their own effort.
Someone who is desperate for a relationship would be problematic for the following reasons: She has nothing going on in her life that's interesting-the only reason to exist is to be in a relationship. That means you'll have the burden of being everything to her.
Being desperate for love often means making it a priority, even over self care and time with friends. This can be dangerous because it often means you are filling a void with dating and relationships.
In many ways, this is an understandable response. We feel alone, insecure or vulnerable, and being with others feel makes us less so. This urge towards relatedness fulfills not just our need for protection and security but also for purpose and direction in life.
Desperation has origins in despair, but has become an emotion with its own distinct identity. Despair is about feeling defeated to the point at which life loses its meaning. Being desperate is what it's like when we can see our defeat approaching, but remain determined to avoid it.