A small 2019 study of 82 people found that the length of intense grief experienced by bereaved pet owners varies —with 25 % taking between 3 months to a year, 50% between one year and 19 months, and 25 % between two and six years. It's no wonder that pet loss therapy is an emerging field.
Psychologist Julie Axelrod has pointed out that the loss of a dog is so painful because owners aren't just losing the pet. It could mean the loss of a source of unconditional love, a primary companion who provides security and comfort, and maybe even a protégé that's been mentored like a child.
Some people experience mental symptoms of grief, which may include confusion, trouble focusing, constant dwelling on your pet, or thinking you see or hear your pet. Loss of an animal companion can also lead to anxiety and depression for some people.
Seventy-five responders reported the loss of a pet and filled out a battery of post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD). I've often written about PTSD; it's defined as the recurring memories and heightened state of arousal that lingers for more than a month after a traumatic event.
Symptoms of acute grief after the loss of a pet can last from one to two months, with symptoms of grief persisting up to a full year (on average).
The stages are: Shock and Denial; Pain and Guilt; Anger and Bargaining; Depression, Reflection, and Loneliness; Adjustment to Life; Your New Normal; Acceptance and Hope. These are the seven stages of grief that I use in my practice when helping people like you explore their grief and loss stages regarding pet loss.
Here are some examples of what not to say when a pet dies: "Don't cry." Crying is part of the grieving process for many people. "It's just a [dog/cat/etc.]." A comment like this that downplays the loss is mean and thoughtless. You don't know what the pet meant to that person.
It's not unusual for dogs to grieve the loss of a person they've bonded with who is no longer present. While they might not understand the full extent of human absence, dogs do understand the emotional feeling of missing someone who's no longer a part of their daily lives.
Contact Your Veterinarian
Alternatively, if it is during the middle of the night or a holiday, you can try to contact a 24 hour emergency office (if one exists nearby). They may also have a way of getting you in touch with someone who can pick up your pet's body (like a pet crematory or mobile vet service).
Give them all the things they enjoy most – their favourite toys, their favourite food. You know what will make your pet feel most at ease in the time that remains. If you become tearful, ask a family member, friend or other trusted person to take care of your pet so you can leave the room and have a cry.
The pets that we had to say goodbye to are alive in heaven right now in their spiritual bodies and we will see them again if we accept Jesus as our Savior. Your Pet Is Not Gone Forever.
Research suggests that when people are in anguish over the loss of a pet, disenfranchised grief makes it more difficult for them to find solace, post-traumatic growth, and healing. Disenfranchised grief seems to restrain emotional expression in a way that makes it harder to process.
Some people start to feel better in weeks or months. For others, the grieving process is measured in years. Whatever your grief experience, it's important to be patient with yourself and allow the process to naturally unfold. Feeling sad, shocked, or lonely is a normal reaction to the loss of a beloved pet.
Why Pet Loss Hurts. “One reason why losing a pet is such a deep loss is because animals' love is so unconditional and accepting,” she said. But it's also because so many aspects of people's lives are impacted. “Every single facet of life is part of the loss,” she explained.
Within the acute phase of death, or immediately following a loss, it is common to cry uncontrollably with intense duration. This is because our bodies are processing through the shock of loss and working hard to reduce the overwhelming emotional experience we are going through.
As we process our grief, our bodies go through a multitude of grief processes. We never truly "get over" our loss, but we can certainly move through it. This post highlights why it is healthy to express our emotions and to cry over the loss of our pet.
And yet the death of a family pet can remind us of how vulnerable, precarious and precious life is. It's that process of acceptance and letting go that builds the resilience necessary to navigate an array of life's obstacles. We hone an ability to adapt to the evanescence of our lives with grace and hope.
Guilt is a normal response to the death of a pet. We want to make sense out of what has happened and as a result, we frequently blame ourselves. Feelings of guilt should subside as you progress through the grieving process.
That's not just anecdotal, either: Research has confirmed that for most people, the loss of a dog is comparable to the loss of a human loved one, in almost every way.
A 2019 study examined the grief timeline in 82 people who lost a pet. About 25% experienced intense grief for 3 to 12 months, 50% for 12 to 19 months, and 25% for 12 to 24 months. So try not to compare your grief to other losses or rush through your feelings.
This is simply a preference of the family and there's no right or wrong choice. Over ninety percent of pets are cremated and less than ten percent are buried. This cremation rate is significantly higher than the cremation rate of people - about half of people are cremated.