Let them vent their feelings and when they finish, pick any of their words that had a lot of emotion attached. These can be words such as “Never,” “Screwed up,” or any other words spoken with high inflection. Then reply with, “Say more about “never” (or “screwed up,” etc.) That will help them drain even more.
Instead of “grinning and bearing” it, you can try to say something along the lines of: “It sounds like this is really important to you. I can see that you're upset by it and need someone to talk to. I want to support you, and I would love to be able to give you the time and space that you need to feel heard.
Just tell the person honestly, that what he/she is saying is overwhelming you, and triggering strong unwanted emotions and memories. If the person stops the venting, good. If the person can't or won't stop, you say that you are unable to continue listening because you feel very overwhelmed and triggered.
Best is if you can say “What happened then?” or “How did that make you feel?” This reassures her that you're engaged with what she's saying and encourages her to go on. Do NOT attempt to analyze her problem or worse, fix it for her.
What is Toxic Venting? Toxic venting feels like an attack on someone's character. Whether you are the one venting, or you're listening to someone else do it, this communication makes the other person out to be “the bad guy.” This type of bad-mouthing becomes an intense form of gossip.
Venting is sometimes necessary to productively express frustration about a person or a problem—but gossiping isn't. Gossip is spread maliciously while venting relieves pent-up frustration. Gossiping is ill-intentioned and mean-spirited and can cause destruction of a person's humanity or reputation.
Emotional dumping is an act of unconsciously sharing your feelings or perspective without an awareness of the other person and their emotional state or needs. Emotional dumping typically occurs as a heightened reactive response to a triggering event that is relived and repeated within a conversation.
People who trauma dump tend to have intense feelings, express emotion excessively and share indiscriminately. In some instances you could have an underlying problem such as borderline personality disorder, post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD) or depression that affects your behavior.
While venting can be a natural part of working through our negative emotions, does it become toxic at a certain point? It turns out, it can. And that's when venting becomes trauma dumping — the act of oversharing your emotions in a way that becomes harmful to the other person.
[Venting is a] coping mechanism that allows a person to rationalize and validate their own fears, concerns, worries, dreams and hopes. If we are not allowed to vent , we end up bottling up our emotions which is detrimental to the human psyche and can end up suffering from it's side effects.
One of the main reasons why we vent is to reduce our stress levels. Rime (2009) states that disclosing stress is a coping mechanism. Venting is a 2-way process: the person venting and the person hearing the vent.
Saying things like, “You're doing great – breathe with me,” can go a long way to support your loved one's recovery. Social talk about normal, everyday topics can distract your loved one from the work or worry they have about trying to get off of the ventilator.
Meaning of venting in English
to express a negative emotion in a forceful and often unfair way: Please don't shout - there's no need to vent your frustration/anger/rage/spleen on me. I didn't mean to upset anyone, I just needed to vent. SMART Vocabulary: related words and phrases.
: to express (a strong emotion, such as anger) in a forceful and open way.
Effects of Venting Anger
Greater feelings of stress and anxiety. Increased negative emotions and moods. Impaired interpersonal relationships. Problems at work, at home, or in social situations.
“Venting may reduce your stress, anger, confusion, or frustration. That can be beneficial,” he says.
An individual may feel emotionally drained when they are overwhelmed by various demands they have to contend with in their daily life. When the demands on a person exceed their personal resources and their perceived ability to cope, it can result in feeling emotionally drained.
Venting can be a healthy expression of emotions that are often suppressed. Complaining is passive. It keeps you stagnant and promotes wallowing in misfortune.
Most of the time, trauma dumping is not purposefully abusive or manipulative. It's more common for a dumper to be so involved in talking about their traumatic experience that they are unaware of how their story is impacting their listeners.
Asking someone if you can vent to them before doing so is good practice if you want to maintain healthy friendships. It gives the person you're venting to the space to assert their own needs, and it forces you to reflect on what you're asking for, why you're asking for it, and how often you make this request.
Venting is processing your feelings with someone so we can think about a situation more clearly. Talking behind someone's back is trying to undermine the reputation of someone else and take away their dignity. Big difference.
Have you been feeling frustrated, sad or just not yourself? Talking to a friend about it may help. Talking allows you to process what's going on for you, and can make you feel better. After all, it's tough dealing with things alone!