If your wife feels distant and has stopped being affectionate with you, there has likely been some lapse in respect or trust that has left her with resentment toward you. Intentional or not, women often use physical neglect as a punishment for something that displeased them.
Some mental health examples include depression, anxiety, post-traumatic stress disorder, or even obsessive compulsive disorder. When someone is under distress due to an imbalance of emotions, then they are less like to show their partner affection.
Sometimes your partner may be giving you less affection than you'd like. In these cases, your partner may just require and prefer to give different levels of affection than you. In some cases, your partner could be trying to deal with effects that come with anxiety or obsessive-compulsive disorder.
People who don't get their dose of affectionate touch seem less happy, more lonely, and have a higher likelihood of suffering from depression, mood and anxiety disorders, as well as secondary immune disorder.
Love does not always require physical touch.
My partner's presence was always appreciated, even if he didn't snuggle with me all the time. As long as we're together, no matter what we're doing, we know that we are in love.
Specifically, compared to people with less skin hunger, people who feel more affection-deprived: are less happy; more lonely; more likely to experience depression and stress; and, in general, in worse health. They have less social support and lower relationship satisfaction.
The best way to deal with an unaffectionate partner is to communicate. Let them know how you feel and listen to them. Then, come up with a feasible plan together.
Men Need Love and Affection
In plain language: Men often feel most loved by the women in their lives when their partners hug them, kiss them, smile at them, and explicitly offer gratitude, praise, and words of affection. Men also feel loved and connected through sexuality, often to a greater degree than women do.
Common signs of touch starvation include: Deep feelings of loneliness: A person may isolate themselves from others for a variety of reasons, such as not knowing how to make friends. Either way, if they notice increased loneliness after a lack of human interaction, they may be experiencing touch starvation.
Emotional withholding is a form of passive-aggressive behavior which qualifies as emotional abuse. Partners often resort to withholding affection as a form of punishing the other person even if they might not realize it.
Someone who's unaffectionate is cold, unemotional, or unfriendly. If you were hoping for a cuddly pal, you might be a little disappointed in your unaffectionate guinea pig. You can also call an unaffectionate person aloof. They're not particularly warm or likely to display much tenderness.
If your relationship is lacking affection, it may be necessary to work on rebuilding your emotional connection. One of the easiest ways to do this is to bond together through things that you both enjoy, whether that's travelling, trying new foods, volunteering, painting, or really anything else.
If your wife won't touch you, maybe something has changed. She may be experiencing depression or a lack of self-confidence, or maybe she feels like she's failing at this parenting thing. Even if it is difficult, do everything you can to put yourself in her shoes.
Feeling Unhappy or Unmotivated
People lacking love therefore feel more depressed. This triggers a range of core beliefs such as worthlessness, or a negative outlook on life. Overtime, we become less motivated to complete tasks, set goals or prioritize our self-care.
Just like women, men need love, warmth, closeness, validation, and acceptance. Men are also more physical (due to a higher level of testosterone), and they express these needs for emotional closeness by doing things side by side with their wives.
Depression, anxiety, stress, and other mental health issues are all linked to lower libido, as are some antidepressants. If your wife is struggling with any mental health issues, she may be less interested in sex at the moment.
There are a few common reasons why couples develop a lack of intimacy. Stress is the most common reason. Stress can come from various sources such as pressure from work, child care, and financial troubles in the family. There are several studies that show the link between stress and a decrease in sex drive.
One reason your wife never initiates affection may be stress related. A study published by the Journal of Sexual Medicine found that women had more difficulty staying focused during intimacy and lower arousal levels when under stress.
Some people are self-conscious, and they feel too vulnerable when put in an intimate situation like that. Others feel like they need more personal space and don't like getting too close for long periods. Having a discussion about cuddling and how you feel about things is a good idea.
Recognize that when a woman shuts down emotionally (or a man!) it is because she is trying to protect herself from getting hurt. Maybe she had a bad experience with a parent or former partner, and she is afraid to be yelled at or abused in some way. Shutting down emotionally is often a form of self-preservation.
For some people, shutting down emotionally is a response to feeling overstimulated. It doesn't have anything to do with you or how they feel about you. If your husband or partner shuts down when you cry, for example, it may be because they don't know the best way to handle that display of emotions.