“If your baby has only slept on an adult, by six months, they will know this is the only way to nap and will become quite upset when you attempt to deviate from the norm,” warns Dubief. “If you don't want to let them nap on you for the long haul, gradually backing out of it earlier—starting at three months—is ideal.”
So how do you know when it's time to stop allowing baby to fall asleep while you're holding them? “When babies start to intentionally smile at you—around 6 to 8 weeks—this is a sign that it's time to try to start having baby nap independently,” says Brown. At this stage, babies become more awake and social.
Some things like cuddling or holding your baby until they fall asleep might be difficult to keep doing for the long term, as it may create a negative sleep association for your baby. They may then only be able to fall asleep if you cuddle or hold them.
Dr. Schwartz recommends to begin sleeping training when your baby is about four months old. At this age, babies are typically old enough to learn to self soothe, and may no longer require night feedings.
Around 3-4 months babies become more aware of their surroundings, so putting older babies to bed awake may be difficult at first, but with lots of practice, it will get easier! If your baby is a newborn and waking when you lay them down, they're most likely in their first stage of sleep (light sleep).
Some babies learn to self-soothe naturally as they get older. However, in other cases, parents or caregivers try to encourage the behavior through various techniques. Many approaches exist for encouraging babies to self-soothe, ranging from the extinction method, or “cry it out” (CIO), to more gradual approaches.
You can't spoil a baby. Contrary to popular myth, it's impossible for parents to hold or respond to a baby too much, child development experts say. Infants need constant attention to give them the foundation to grow emotionally, physically and intellectually.
They've just spent the previous nine months being "held" in the womb, so of course they want a cozy place to snooze. Plus, since they're born without a concept of day and night, they need some time to develop sleep patterns on their own.
It is a common misconception that if you want your baby to sleep well, you have to do some form of sleep training, but we're here to tell you this isn't the case! Many babies, and especially those under 3-4 months of age, are perfectly capable of achieving good sleep without any formal sleep training.
Basically you give your baby a cuddle, say it's time to sleep, then put her in her cot. Then if she grizzles or cries, you pick her up and help her calm down. Then put baby back into bed calm and awake, and have another try to settle in bed. Repeat until baby is calm in bed and falls asleep.
What to do Wait about 20 minutes or so — until your baby has fallen into a deeper level of sleep — before trying to transfer her to a crib or some other sleeping surface. Why it works When your baby first falls asleep, she's really just dozing. If you try to set her down, she'll wake up quickly.
The longer you hold your baby, the better. Any amount of time is good, but it is best to try for at least 1 to 2 hours each day.
A 2017 study confirms what many parents already instinctively know: You should pick up babies every time they cry. The research from the University of Notre Dame found that it was impossible to spoil an infant by holding or cuddling him, according to an article at News.co.au.
Always wash your hands before touching a newborn.
It is important for any visitor to wash their hands before touching a baby. In the early months of life, illnesses can be very dangerous for an infant. In fact, even what is considered a "low grade" fever might require hospitalization to rule out serious issues.
You may want to start off by slowly moving their cot further away from your bed each night – so that they can get used to sleeping in their own space, while still being close to you. Then, once they've adjusted, you can move the crib into their own bedroom. Or switch it round and bunk up with them for a few nights.
Contact Napping Defined
The emotional connection achieved through physical contact can increase your baby's feelings of security and result in a deeper sleep. Moreover, the attachment and bonds formed during a contact nap can have lifelong benefits for your little one.
Simply put, there are no negatives to 'in contact' naps for children and they will outgrow the need for them. Allowing 'in contact' naps is perhaps the least stressful option for the whole family.
Around 3-5 months, you should also be on the lookout for the five signs of self-soothing: sucking on hands and fingers, bringing hands to midline, burrowing into a parent's armpit to turn off stimulation, developing a whiney, self-soothing cry, and rolling on his side or tummy.
Research shows that even if a baby stops crying, their cortisol levels (stress hormone) remains elevated. This means that baby didn't learn to actually soothe herself, she simply learned there was no point in crying. Crying in and of itself doesn't create elevated cortisol levels or kick in the fight or flight reflex.
There are several ways of re-settling baby. Hands-on settling is one option where you comfort your baby with gentle 'ssshh' sounds, gentle rhythmic patting, rocking or stroking until baby is calm or asleep.