For some people, shutting down emotionally is a response to feeling overstimulated. It doesn't have anything to do with you or how they feel about you. If your husband or partner shuts down when you cry, for example, it may be because they don't know the best way to handle that display of emotions.
Instead of getting angry, take a deep breath and take a break from the conversation. Once you are calm, you can return to your spouse with a clear head. Don't take your partner's shutting down emotionally personally. Though it is frustrating, it is their coping mechanism, not an attack on you.
One is that we are so numb that we allow ourselves to be in bad, even dangerous situations. We're so cut off from our emotions that we don't realize we're being hurt and that we shouldn't be there. Another thing that happens when we shut down emotionally is that we lose our empathy.
Men get quiet for all kinds of reasons.
Sometimes they really are tired. Sometimes, they really do just need to zone out and not talk. Sometimes, they do get frozen with work stress. They may have no clue what's bothering them or they may be wrestling with depression, fears of intimacy, or worries about the future.
Conclusion. There are several answers to why do guys disappear when they like you. It could be that he is scared of letting someone in, unsure of his feelings towards you, or doesn't think you are good enough for him. If you are in such a situation, you must prioritize yourself above everything else.
It is often done to punish or control the other person. A person who is stonewalling their partner may see it as a way to gain power. On the other hand, unintentional stonewalling often occurs when a person feels overwhelmed, anxious, or powerless during a conversation.
Over time, men get really good at turning off their emotions or coping with their feelings in a way that is more acceptable for males. It creates a cycle of toxic masculinity, which can be hard to break once it's a habit.
Many guys hate failing and feeling inadequate. They often don't have the speed of words to compete with their partner in a conflict. Men's emotional processing capacity is often much slower than their partner. Whilst being silent is a sign of a man's need to process it is also a way to avoid the feelings of defeat.
Common reasons why a partner withdraws include betrayal, internal personal conflicts, and the re-emergence of trauma. There are times in every relationship when one partner becomes unavailable to the other while going inward to understand.
Intense emotions, such as anger, frustration, or sadness, can become overpowering and make it challenging to engage constructively in the conversation. Shutting down may be an automatic defense mechanism to protect oneself from further emotional distress.
Men often feel that they need to be self-reliant and provide for their loved ones, so it is not appropriate to express their emotions. This behaviour can be reinforced in the stereotype of the heroic male, so often represented in popular culture.
You Are Not Spending Enough Time Together
If he makes excuses to bail out of a date with you and shows lack of enthusiasm to propose going out with you, it is a sure sign that your man is losing interest in you. Coercing him to make plans with you may also invite more excuses from him if he is trying to avoid you.
If he doesn't have the bandwidth for a relationship, then he'll end one before it gets too demanding. As soon as he feels drained or unable to stay on top of everything, he might recognize it isn't a great time for a serious connection. He may put a pause on any romance because he wants to focus on his own development.
If someone has been through such a traumatic event that their body tips into shutdown response, any event that reminds the person of that life-threatening occurrence can trigger them into disconnection or dissociation again. People can even live in a state of disconnection or shutdown for days or months at a time.
According to one report, the male stress response can be characterized as “fight-or-flight.” When men are faced with a stressful situation, their bodies release hormones that prompt them to either stay and confront the problem, or to run away and avoid it.
14) He feels you're too different from him
This is a pretty common reason men lose interest in a new relationship. A man might not be initially interested in you for the same reasons he wasn't interested in his ex. Instead of finding you physically attractive, he might find you to be a bit too different from him.
Well, it is possible in any relationship. There are many reasons for this in a bonding. When men start to lose interest in their women, some may look for a new relationship and others try to adjust with their existing partner.
Lost feelings can come back, but you have to prove that you are worth being in a relationship with and you don't achieve that by being clingy and needy. So, start by taking a break.
John Gottman, a marriage therapist who did extensive research on stonewalling in partnerships, found men often react to disagreements with more signs of physiological stress than women do, and thus, they have been shown to be more likely to stonewall than women, often in an attempt to remain neutral or avoid conflict.
Stonewalling is, well, what it sounds like. In a discussion or argument, the listener withdraws from the interaction, shutting down and closing themselves off from the speaker because they are feeling overwhelmed or physiologically flooded. Metaphorically speaking, they build a wall between them and their partner.