Why do I always overexplain?

According to Banks, overexplaining can be a trauma response and can develop as a result of gaslighting. She adds that anxiety or ADHD can also lead to overexplaining and it can happen to those who grew up with a strict upbringing where “you had to justify your choices”.

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How do I stop overexplaining everything?

5 Ways to Stop Over-Explaining
  1. By John Millen.
  2. Losing attention and credibility.
  3. Listen and put your listeners first.
  4. Remember, less is more.
  5. Focus your message.
  6. Give the bottom line first.
  7. Make it a conversation.

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Why do people overexplain to me?

You may see over-explaining as a way to be honest or to boost another person's emotional state. It could also be that you are a chattier person, especially when you feel you can contribute to the situation, and, once stimulated, you talk too much.

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Is overexplaining yourself a trauma response?

In fact, it's a trauma response known as fawning. At its core, Caroline Fenkel, LCSW, chief clinical officer at Charlie Health, says that fawning (aka over-explaining yourself) is an attempt to avoid conflict.

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Is Overexplaining an ADHD trait?

With ADHD, you might overexplain when you're talking about something you're passionate about and you really just want the other person to know about it too. Or, you're caught in the midst of racing thoughts and you just can't stop talking.

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Confessions of a Recovering Explainer: How to Stop Being an Overexplainer.

23 related questions found

What does it mean when you overexplain?

overexplained; overexplaining. transitive + intransitive. : to explain (something) to an excessive degree.

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What is the psychology of over-explaining?

You may see over-explaining as a way to be honest or to boost another person's emotional state. It could also be that you are a chattier person, especially when you feel you can contribute to the situation, and, once stimulated, you talk too much.

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Why can't I stop over explaining?

Over-explaining is a nervous habit, and it's one that comes from fear: Fear of delivering a message that could sound harsh. Fear of taking a strong position that isn't 100% bulletproof. Fear of not making sense. Fear of people thinking your idea is dumb.

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Why do I feel like I have to justify myself all the time?

Cognitive dissonance. The need to justify our actions and decisions, especially the ones inconsistent with our beliefs, comes from the unpleasant feeling called cognitive dissonance. Cognitive dissonance is a state of tension that occurs whenever a person holds two inconsistent cognitions.

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How do I stop justifying myself?

How to Stop Justifying Yourself
  1. Admit you have a problem.
  2. Know when to be on high alert.
  3. Let humility toughen you up.
  4. Live with inconsistency.
  5. Be actively disconfirmation biased.
  6. Use self-justification to your advantage.

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What is the people pleasing response to trauma?

A fourth, less discussed, response to trauma is called fawning, or people-pleasing. The fawn response is a coping mechanism in which individuals develop people-pleasing behaviors to avoid conflict, pacify their abusers, and create a sense of safety.

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Are ADHD people Overthinkers?

The ADHD brain also gets easily consumed. This means ADHD and overthinking kind of go hand in hand. The ADHD brain grasps hold of your thoughts and runs away with them, while emotions keep the engine running.

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Is oversharing a symptom of ADHD?

It's common for people with ADHD to overshare information. People may be impulsive and not stop to think about what they're saying. Treating ADHD can help people improve self-control and think about consequences.

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Is obsessing over things part of ADHD?

Obsessing and ruminating are often part of living with attention deficit hyperactivity disorder (ADHD). No matter how hard you try to ignore them, those negative thoughts just keep coming back, replaying themselves in an infinite loop.

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What trauma causes oversharing?

If you're highly self-conscious or socially anxious, worrying about being perceived as a “toxic person” might lead you to under-share your needs and to a lack of connection with others. On the other hand, oversharing may be a trauma response or a sign that you are ready for or need support.

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What trauma is over explaining?

Over-explaining can be considered a fawn trauma response. Fawning is when a person engages in people-pleasing behaviors in order to avoid conflict.

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What is trauma dumping?

“Trauma dumping is the unfiltered sharing of strong emotions or upsetting experiences without permission from the listener.” – Talkspace therapist Dr. Olga Molina, D.S.W., LCSW.

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Is explaining too much is bad?

Whether you are in a sales conversation, networking, negotiation or even communicating in email or in your marketing, over-explaining is a sure way to lose your power. How? 1. Trying to prove yourself often makes the other person want to fight back which creates conflict.

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How do you tolerate someone who talks too much?

Here are five tips...
  1. Set a time limit to the conversation. Most people who like to talk a lot will respect your limits if you set a clear expectation with them. ...
  2. Make your talker feel heard. ...
  3. Don't be afraid to be assertive and enforce boundaries. ...
  4. Take time away for yourself. ...
  5. Treat people with kindness.

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Why do some people never shut up?

Some states of mania, anxiety, or agitation make people talk non-stop. Talking is a way to express their anguish. Their restlessness keeps them from being quiet or listening. Their way of talking is compulsive, and often disordered.

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What is an example of someone who talks too much?

A loquacious person talks a lot, often about stuff that only they think is interesting. You can also call them chatty or gabby, but either way, they're loquacious.

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What is it called when you have a hard time explaining things?

Apraxia of speech.

It is sometimes called verbal apraxia.

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What are the signs of ADHD in female adults?

Adult ADHD symptoms may include:
  • Impulsiveness.
  • Disorganization and problems prioritizing.
  • Poor time management skills.
  • Problems focusing on a task.
  • Trouble multitasking.
  • Excessive activity or restlessness.
  • Poor planning.
  • Low frustration tolerance.

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Are people with ADHD highly intelligent?

A popular misconception is that all children with attention deficit hyperactivity disorder (ADHD) are naturally smarter and have a higher IQ than children without ADHD. However, there is no correlation between this condition and intelligence.

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