According to neuroscientist and inventor of BrainTap Patrick Porter, PhD, the
The need to justify our actions and decisions, especially the ones inconsistent with our beliefs, comes from the unpleasant feeling called cognitive dissonance. Cognitive dissonance is a state of tension that occurs whenever a person holds two inconsistent cognitions.
You may see over-explaining as a way to be honest or to boost another person's emotional state. It could also be that you are a chattier person, especially when you feel you can contribute to the situation, and, once stimulated, you talk too much.
: to provide an explanation for one's actions. Why should I have to justify myself when it was their fault?
Like its close cousin "justice," justification is derived from the Latin justificare, which means "to make right." When you offer a justification, you're trying to make something right—or, perhaps, even just.
n. 1. in ethics, the process of determining right actions and appropriate beliefs. 2. in clinical psychology, defensive intellectualization, as in making an excuse for an action, cognition, or affect that one knows to be or is considered to be wrong or indefensible.
In fact, it's a trauma response known as fawning. At its core, Caroline Fenkel, LCSW, chief clinical officer at Charlie Health, says that fawning (aka over-explaining yourself) is an attempt to avoid conflict.
overexplained; overexplaining. transitive + intransitive. : to explain (something) to an excessive degree. The stories tended to be as simple as a good children's picture-book, so that nothing needed to be overexplained.
According to Banks, overexplaining can be a trauma response and can develop as a result of gaslighting. She adds that anxiety or ADHD can also lead to overexplaining and it can happen to those who grew up with a strict upbringing where “you had to justify your choices”.
Over-explaining is a nervous habit, and it's one that comes from fear: Fear of delivering a message that could sound harsh. Fear of taking a strong position that isn't 100% bulletproof. Fear of not making sense. Fear of people thinking your idea is dumb.
When you explain yourself, you give someone else permission to validate your self-worth. Unless you've committed a crime, or have a set of duties you are paid to do, there is no reason you need to be explaining yourself to anyone.
Some possible reasons that come to mind are . You worry too much about what the others may think and feel about you , You are unsure about your own communication skills ,and get confused , as too many points flood your mind at the same time , which you cannot handle ,and decide which is important.
Trauma dumping refers to sharing a traumatic story without thinking about how it will affect the listener, or oversharing in an inappropriate context.
Fawning is a trauma response where a person develops people-pleasing behaviors to avoid conflict and to establish a sense of safety. In other words, the fawn trauma response is a type of coping mechanism that survivors of complex trauma adopt to "appease" their abusers.
If you live with complex trauma or post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD), trauma dumping or oversharing could be a natural trauma response and coping mechanism.
What is the fawn response? Fawning refers to consistently abandoning your own needs to serve others to avoid conflict, criticism, or disapproval. Fawning is also called the “please and appease” response and is associated with people-pleasing and codependency.
Emotional trauma is recognizable by a persistent sense of unsafety and other challenging emotions such as fear and/or anxiety. It is often accompanied by other physical symptoms as well, such as chronic insomnia, nightmares, and other health issues.
Over-explaining means describing something to an excessive degree, whereas oversharing is the disclosure of an inappropriate amount of information and detail about your personal life. These fall under the fawn trauma response (see podcast #302 for more information on the different trauma responses).
Hedonistic dissonance is aroused when people act in a way that results in negative consequences for themselves.
Rationalization: The justification of one's behavior through attempts at a rational explanation. This defense mechanism may be present in someone who steals money but feels justified in doing so because they needed the money more than the person from whom they stole.
Justification sets people free from sin's penalty; sanctification means being set from sin's power. Justification is something that God does for us; sanctification is what God does with us. Justification is by grace through faith, while sanctification is by grace applied in life.
The five justification defenses are self-defense, necessity, duress, protecting others from harm, and defending your personal property.