It's a tradition that dates back to women being considered property, chattels to be passed on from father to husband. Yet it remains the norm: about 80 per cent of women in Australia take their husband's name when they marry. Even high-profile women whose names are almost brands think along these lines.
Women who take their spouse's last name do so for various reasons, from wanting to embrace tradition to being concerned that children will end up confused or unhappy if the parents have different last names.
Despite a growing feminism movement and increased gender equality, the overwhelming commonness of this practice remains. Contemporarily, “at least in the US, about 20% to 30% of women retain their name, meaning the vast majority take their spouse's name when they marry,” Carr said.
See for yourself what they had to say: 63.3 percent of Men's Health followers said they would be upset if their wives kept their maiden names. 96.3 percent of Men's Health followers said they wouldn't take a woman's last name if she asked them to. What are your thoughts on women who keep their last names?
There is absolutely nothing wrong with going down the traditional route, so long as the ramifications and reasons for doing so are understood by both parties. Discussions about what to do with a surname may initially be nerve-wracking, but I urge you to push through.
When you marry you are free to keep your name or take your husband's name but one thing is clear—it's absolutely your choice in most states and countries around the world. In fact, it's becoming much more popular for a recently married woman to keep her last name.
Why aren't more men taking their wives' names when they get married? “There is this assumption that female last names are the changeable, malleable ones,” journalist and author Jill Filipovic said.
In British tradition, a double surname is heritable, usually taken to preserve a family name that would have become extinct due to the absence of male descendants bearing the name, connected to the inheritance of a family estate.
Typical protocol says that prior to the wedding day (on Save the Dates, Invitations, etc.) the bride's name should precede the groom's. And after the wedding day (on Thank You cards, Address Labels, etc.) that the groom's name precedes his new wife.
PSU sociology professor Emily Fitzgibbons Shafer analyzed data collected from a nationally representative survey that asked men if they did anything to their surnames in their most recent marriage. Of the 877 men, only 27, or 3 percent, changed their name.
You can keep your maiden name, hyphenate or come up with a new name that combines both of your last names. But what about your husband taking your last name instead? A man taking his wife's name is often seen as uncommon. However, it's pretty common for queer couples to take each other's last names.
You won't have to change your things
Keeping your own last name might just be a simpler practical solution, even just for the ease of knowing that your name can stay yours and you won't have to navigate the weird in-between period where half of your business cards have one name and half have another.
In some states, married women could not legally vote under their maiden name until the mid-1970s. The opposite—a man taking his wife's name—remains incredibly rare: In a recent study of 877 heterosexual married men, less than 3 percent took their wife's name when they got married.
According to this philosophy, the respect that the wife accords to the husband acts as a rejuvenating force for the male psyche, and helps the male to regularly regain his strength and thus prolong his life. The wife then, by calling the husband by his name, is said to be lessening the lifespan of the husband.
It is a legal commitment that has familial, social, and economic implications. This is the declaration of your love and devotion to your partner and affirms lifelong commitment in front of near and dear ones. In addition, many believe that communities get better when people enter into marriage and stay together.
Outside of the traditional, formal “Mr. & Mrs. John Doe”, the wife's name is ALWAYS first when using first names: “Jane and John Doe” (1). In social importance, the woman is always first, then males, then children.
Addressing a Couple
NOTE: Traditionally, a woman's name preceded a man's on an envelope address, and his first and surname were not separated (Jane and John Kelly). Nowadays, the order of the names—whether his name or hers comes first—does not matter and either way is acceptable.
In traditional wedding etiquette, the bride's name goes first followed by the groom's name. This is because traditionally it is the bride's parents who are hosting (and financing) the wedding and it is they who are inviting the guests to attend.
You can choose to take a joint surname which is a combination of both of your surnames. For instance, if Jane Citizen married John Smith you can take the surname Citizen-Smith or Smith-Citizen. It's your choice whether to use a hyphen or space between the surnames and in which order the names should appear.
This is a doctrine based on the patriarchal assumption that a father's surname would deepen the family institution or provide children with more financial security later in life. Or, it is the easiest way to ensure the family name's legacy.
Baby gets the dad's/partner's name
Pros: The default choice in the United States is to give your child the last name of their father. This tradition is practiced by parents in a variety of situations – including heterosexual couples, same-sex couples, couples who adopt, and couples who choose not to marry.
When a man has divorced, his ex can retain his last name if she wishes. Some do it because they think it may be to their advantage socially to be associated with the family. I have heard of others doing it because they didn't like their maiden name.
Many women choose to hold onto their married name after a divorce because of their children. Sharing the same last name can make women feel more connected to their children. It can also provide a sense of stability for younger children who will not understand why their mother has a different last name.
However typical reasons people change their name are: if you get married or enter into a civil partnership, or you want to take your partner's name. if you get divorced, dissolve a civil partnership, or end a long-term relationship. to take a double-barrelled name after you marry, or enter into a civil partnership.