INFJs are extremely observant, and it's easy for us to see all the many ways in which we don't fit in with the groups around us. What is much more confusing though, is why we don't fit in. This leads most INFJ personality types to feel alone, misunderstood, rejected, or weird (and not in a good way).
The most difficult part of having this personality is the chronic, never-ending feeling of solitude and loneliness. It is partially self sabotaged and created, but also so intrinsically part of us that to separate this part of ourselves would mean we would not be who we are.
In my experience as an MBTI® practitioner, one of the most common struggles I hear from INFJs is the struggle of being misunderstood. INFJs feel misunderstood in their external environment and even by themselves.
Sensitive people like INFJs absorb more information than others and are more aware of emotions, so they tend to experience information overload more quickly. They become stressed when they are subjected to too much information, including noise, crowds, bright lights and other people's feelings and moods.
Here's Who Drives an INFJ Crazy:
They have a ceaseless hunger for authority, especially over your decisions. They pride themselves on “telling it like it is”, but this only succeeds in making the look superior and unabashedly tactless.
Advocate (INFJ) Weaknesses. Sensitive to Criticism – Advocates aren't averse to feedback – that is, unless they believe that someone is challenging their most cherished principles or values. When it comes to the issues that are near and dear to them, people with this personality type can become defensive or dismissive.
When INFJs are stressed or depressed, it's difficult for them focus on any one thing and they may feel an urgent need to just “shut off” in terms of sleeping, watching television, or otherwise distracting themselves from their thoughts.
People with this personality type are often called “the counselor” or “the protector.” They are creative, gentle and caring people. INFJs are good at seeing the big picture and understanding complex ideas. They are often attracted to careers in the arts, writing, counseling, or politics.
According to Priebe's survey, 35.67% of INFJs list “Quality Time” as their preferred love language. This is followed by Words of Affirmation (25.54%), Physical Touch (21.83%), Acts of Service (14.04%), and Gifts (2.92%).
Too many details or other sensory stimuli can provoke a stress reaction in INFJs, especially when you feel uncertain about a situation. Unexpected environments, events or interruptions unsettle you greatly since you are forced to focus on immediate, sensory details rather than relying on your intuition.
INFJs are capable of mechanical memorization, but the amount retained this way is less than from memory based on understanding. INFJs are capable of accurately reproducing received information, especially if they associate it with any feelings.
9. You cry easily. This one is especially problematic, as it often happens at very inopportune or embarrassing moments. Like all Feeling types, INFJs are prone to random tears.
INFJs are not easy to read, but they can easily read others. INFJs pick up on other people's moods, energy or intentions and can read them like a book. But they hide their own feelings behind a poker face, so it's tough for others to read them.
Dominant Function – Introverted Intuition (Ni)
Introverted Intuition is the strongest and most accessible function of the INFJ. In a way, this is the function they live and breathe.
Because of how INFJs deal with past pain, they're likely to have similar reactions to trauma. These include: Avoiding people, places, or things that remind them of the trauma. Experiencing fear and anxiety about the outside world.
They appreciate intellectual stimulation and are always looking for ways to learn and understand complex ideas as this sparks joy in them. INFJs are most often happiest when they feel they are making progress towards their personal and professional goals.
Of course, not all INFJs are depressed, and INFJs are certainly not the only Myers-Briggs personality types to struggle with depression. However, due to our sensitive nature, as well as our unique way of seeing the world, it's not uncommon for us INFJs to deal with depression at some point in our lives.
Strongly humanitarian in outlook, INFJs tend to be idealists, and they are generally doers as well as dreamers. They often choose careers that allow them to use their inner vision, their ability to establish and maintain harmonious relationships, their creativity, and their strong oral and written communication skills.
INFJs are often misunderstood because their personality makes them seem more intense than the average person. As introverts, they are prone to deep thinking and ongoing internal monologues. As intuitive feelers, they are adept at reading and understanding the emotions of others.
In short: INFJs are decisive, efficient, and organized while still being emotional, warm, and empathetic. They are also Introverted yet acutely sensitive to others' feelings and needs. These apparently contradictory characteristics make INFJs the most complex personality type.
INFJs and Boredom
You feel bored when you lack a long-term vision or purpose. You tend to be single-minded and idealistic, always searching for the “one thing” that you were called to do in life.
Usually, they will get more withdrawn and stuck in their head when they're angry. They might try to shut off noise, lights, or find a room they can hide away in to deal with their thoughts and charged emotions. Some INFJs shut down and stop talking and reacting, trying to sort out their thoughts inside.
INFJs ranked as having low dominance according to the CPI™ tool. Since the traits linked with low-dominance were being quiet, cautious, or hesitant to take action, this makes sense. INFJs tend to be on the quiet side, and they also tend to be extremely independent.