In close relationships, a person with BPD may appear jealous, possessive, or hyper-reactive.
When people with BPD feel jealous, they can react in a number of ways. Some people lash out at their loved one. Others give the cold shoulder or freeze out their loved one. Some turn the pain they feel inward and may struggle with self-harm or suicidal thoughts.
Morbid jealousy can occur in a number of conditions such as chronic alcoholism, addiction to substances other than alcohol (i.e. cocaine, amphetamines.), organic brain disorders (i.e. Parkinson's, Huntington's), schizophrenia, neurosis, affective disturbances or personality disorders.
In an effort to demonstrate their intense feelings, they might threaten a partner with an affair or intentionally act out sexually with others to get the attention of a partner. They are willing to place boundaries on others behavior but refuse to self-regulate or agree with boundaries being placed on them.
Those who have BPD tend to be very intense, dramatic, and exciting. This means they tend to attract others who are depressed and/or suffering low self-esteem. People who take their power from being a victim, or seek excitement in others because their own life is not where they want it to be.
Jealousy is a prominent feature for those with Narcissistic Personality Disorder and Borderline Personality Disorder (NPD and BPD).
Measures of jealousy
As we described above, delusional jealousy is a psychiatric phenomenon in which an individual has a delusional belief that their spouse (or sexual partner) is being unfaithful [6]. It is also known as morbid jealousy, pathological jealousy, conjugal paranoia, or Othello syndrome [6].
The young woman with BPD told Elite Daily, “Long story short, it's very hard for those with BPD to have successful and healthy relationships and stable confidence levels. Our version of 'logical thinking' is most often overthinking. We have a very hard time distinguishing between real issues or imaginary issues.
When people with BPD feel jealous, they can react in a number of ways. Some people lash out at their loved one. Others give the cold shoulder or freeze out their loved one. Some turn the pain they feel inward and may struggle with self-harm or suicidal thoughts.
People with BPD see their favorite person as someone they can't live without. “People with BPD often find themselves placing their attention on one specific person. This person may be a friend, family member, or romantic partner.
Research has yet to show a direct connection between BPD and an increased likelihood of cheating. Rather, a hallmark feature of borderline personality—impulsive behavior—sometimes manifests as sexual preoccupation, early sexual exposure, casual sexual relationships, and promiscuity.
Also, the inability to self-soothe can lead to impulsive, reckless behavior. People with BPD are often on edge. They have high distress and anger levels, so they may be easily offended.
At first, a favorite person may seem like a “savior” for the individual with BPD. They often believe this person is perfect, and they will inherently idolize them. As a result, they may feel euphoric when spending time together and often miss them deeply when they are apart.
Jealous: People with this type of delusional disorder believe that their spouse or sexual partner is unfaithful without any concrete evidence. Persecutory: People with this type of delusional disorder believe someone or something is mistreating, spying on or attempting to harm them (or someone close to them).
Morbid jealousy is signaled by irrational, obsessive thoughts centered around a lover or ex-lover's possible sexual unfaithfulness, together with unacceptable or extreme behavior. Surprisingly, it occurs more often in older individuals and in males.
Those who are affected by Othello syndrome experience obsessive, intrusive, and/or delusional thoughts, particularly about their partner's imagined cheating. Obsessive thoughts are those which are recognizably unreal but prompt a compulsive response, such as constantly contacting the suspected romantic partner.
Our data confirm a prominent role of shame when describing positive features of the own face, but they emphasize also disgust and envy as distinct emotional experience characterizing individuals with BPD when being confronted with the self.
Common triggers of BPD rage can include: Emotionally challenging situations that seem threatening. Situations where the person fears abandonment. BPD splitting, which is a type of black-and-white thinking where people see things as either all-good or all-bad.
For someone with this type of BPD relationship, a “favorite person” is someone they rely on for comfort, happiness, and validation. The relationship with a BPD favorite person may start healthy, but it can often turn into a toxic love-hate cycle known as idealization and devaluation.
Your boyfriend may have borderline personality disorder if he is struggling with emotional regulation and self-image, has increasingly unstable personal relationships, and is engaging in impulsive behaviors like substance abuse, binge eating, or self-harming.
Symptoms of borderline personality disorder can include: Behavioral symptoms: Impulsivity and recklessness, such as impulsive, unsafe sex, reckless driving, substance abuse, spending sprees, and binge-eating. Seductive or flirtatious behavior.
But maybe being with someone with BPD is not all bad. Many people with borderline personality disorder are intuitive, empathetic, passionate, spontaneous, resilient, creative, curious, intense, intelligent, and courageous. When not triggered, they can love deeply and commit to their partner and family.