A narcissistic parent will often appear to be wholly invested in their child only to simply lose interest in them if they can no longer control the child and manipulate them to provide the supply of devotion and obedience which is required of them.
Narcissistic parents often cannot cope with complex relationships and may "replace" the child as they enter adolescence and early adulthood. Being rejected and replaced can cause deep-rooted insecurities, as well as lifelong relationship and self-esteem issues.
According to Perpetua Neo, a psychologist and therapist who specializes in people with DTP traits, the answer is no. "Narcissists, psychopaths, and sociopaths do not have a sense of empathy," she told Business Insider. "They do not and will not develop a sense of empathy, so they can never really love anyone."
Narcissists often emotionally reject a child that reminds them of their own insecurities and flaws. As an adult, strong boundaries, detached contact, or no contact at all are the best ways to deal with the relationship.
Narcissistic parents are often emotionally abusive to their children, holding them to impossible and constantly changing expectations. Those with narcissistic personality disorder are highly sensitive and defensive. They tend to lack self-awareness and empathy for other people, including their own children.
A narcissist will put on a good show for court and shout how they have 'the best interests of the child' in mind, but when you look closely, the evidence will say otherwise. Narcissists are incapable of putting anyone's needs before their own, and can often put the child at risk of harm.
They may say or do things that are hurtful and offensive to others grieving the same loss, making it even more challenging to help them get through their grief. A narcissist may feel that the death of their loved one is an inconvenience to them and feel burdened by their loved one choosing an “inopportune time” to die.
They play favorites.
They may have a golden child who they compliment excessively, for example, while speaking badly about another child in the family.
Jealousy and Possessiveness
Since a narcissistic mother or father often hopes that the child will permanently dwell under the parent's influence, she or he may become extremely jealous at any signs of the child's growing maturity and independence.
Narcissists see their children as extensions of themselves, or as objects to be used to meet their needs, which renders them incapable of taking care of the emotional needs of another person.
They go on to attract narcissists into their lives as partners and friends, and may go on to endure anything up to a lifetime of narcissistic abuse. The tragic reality is that narcissists don't (and can't) love their children in the way that ordinary people do.
A good parent is available, responsive, and consistent with their child. A good parent helps their child develop a realistic sense of self by mirroring their thoughts, feelings, emotions, and needs. Narcissists can't be a good parent because they are incapable of having emotional closeness that good parenting requires.
Children of narcissists often end up in relationships with people who have narcissistic traits. These children feel like they can never be good enough for their partner or themselves, so they become codependent on the other person to make them happy and validate their self-worth.
A golden child's sense of self and their personal boundaries are erased, as their own sense of identity is replaced with the need to live up to their role. Their behaviors and beliefs reflect what their parent expects of them, and they may feel incapable of individuation even in adulthood.
Narcissists Will Eventually End Up Friendless and Unpopular, Study Confirms.
At the end of a relationship, narcissists may become combative, passive-aggressive, hostile, and even more controlling. People with NPD often fail to understand other people's needs and values. They are hyper focused on their egos, but do not account for how their actions affect others.
In the stories of adult children of narcissists, its very common to find accounts of rage attacks and of unpredictable, emotionally volatile behavior by their abusive parents.
A narcissistic parent will often abuse the normal parental role of guiding their children and being the primary decision maker in the child's life, becoming overly possessive and controlling. This possessiveness and excessive control disempowers the child; the parent sees the child simply as an extension of themselves.
Social learning theory holds that children are likely to grow up to be narcissistic when their parents overvalue them: when their parents see them as more special and more entitled than other children (9).
The best way to shut down a narcissist is to walk away from them. If all else fails, you can physically remove yourself from the conversation. Even if they keep talking, simply turn around and walk away. If they follow you, close the door.
Narcissists are very demanding and entitled. As a result they commonly set unrealistic expectations for the people around them, including their mothers. The narcissist will expect his mom to be available at all times of the day, paying constant attention to him and showering him with endless affection.
No one is exempt from narcissistic projection, not even their children. It often comes as a shock to people who have children with pathological narcissists how easily some of them abandon their children. Many narcissistic parents have an emotionally immature worldview.
Narcissism tends to emerge as a psychological defence in response to excessive levels of parental criticism, abuse or neglect in early life. Narcissistic personalities tend to be formed by emotional injury as a result of overwhelming shame, loss or deprivation during childhood.