There's a theory that throughout our lifetime, we will fall in love three times, at three different stages of our lives. Each love feels totally unique from the other and teaches us something different that shapes the person that we becoming.
The three types of love are the first love, the intense love, and the unconditional love. Ahead, we're breaking down the meaning of each and what you typically learn from each stage of love.
Your First Love Leaves An Imprint On Your Brain
Since your memory is much stronger during this period, you're much more likely to remember the experience of falling in love vividly. “Your first love is hard to forget because it leaves an 'imprint' on the sensory areas of your brain,” Bordelon says.
If you pick someone randomly, the probability they're your perfect match is just one percent. Not exactly promising. But with the Optimal Stopping Problem, you can bring your chances of finding love up to 37 percent, theoretically.
True love is rare; we can only hope to find it once in a lifetime, and maybe not even then. The curve that charts love is very narrow – more like a steeple than a bell. It's called a Poisson curve, and its classic example was the chance of being kicked to death by a horse while serving in the Prussian cavalry.
“Love can happen many times. If you fall in love and the person turns out to be the wrong one for you, you can't force yourself to continue loving him, just because you believe that love only happens once. You can fall in love with 20 wrong people till you find the right one whom you're the most compatible with.
A strong and healthy relationship is built on the three C's: Communication, Compromise and Commitment.
The fourth love is agape love. This is the highest form of love. Agape love is selfless, sacrificial, and unconditional. Agape love is also volitional. It is a choice to love in this way, the choice of the highest good for God and God's creation.
All healthy relationships share the following three core components: Mutual respect. Mutual trust. Mutual affection.
1. Never invalidate or erase the personal reality of someone you love. Every one of us counts on our partner supporting and validating the way we see the world, even if he or she doesn't see it the same way.
Signs That You May Love Too Much
You may love until it hurts or until you completely lose yourself in your relationships. You frequently feel neglected or unappreciated. You can't understand why your loved one isn't as wrapped up in the relationship as you are. Yet even though you feel unappreciated, you keep giving.
Your third relationship comes to you when you've already given up on the idea of finding your soulmate. That's when you find someone with whom you actually get along, and you start building your soulmate relationship. This is when you learn that love isn't something you find, it's something you develop.
First love is pure and innocent
It strikes at the most unexpected time and everything falls in place naturally. That is one of the many things that makes first love so special and memorable. Nothing about first love is selfish or with a motive. It's pure and filled with innocence.
Even if at the moment you feel like you've lost everything, trust me, you will love again and your second love will be even better than your first one. Your second love is better because you've learned from your mistakes.
A first love is significant for so many reasons. When you've never experienced deep romantic feelings for someone before, everything feels heightened, overwhelming, and new. “Your first love is mostly a projection of the vast reality of love that is inside you already,” explains breakup expert Kate Galt.
“Love can happen many times. If you fall in love and the person turns out to be the wrong one for you, you can't force yourself to continue loving him, just because you believe that love only happens once. You can fall in love with 20 wrong people till you find the right one whom you're the most compatible with.
It's going to sound a lot like a fairy tale but it's possible to fall in love more than once with the same person. Here, we don't mean in gaps or with breaks in the middle – we mean throughout the course of the same relationship. Before you start feeling cynical, here's our logic for it. Love, essentially, is WORK.
Emotional behaviours and inclinations
According to Ken Munyua, a Nairobi-based psychologist, men can have a sense of attachment and commitment to more than one romantic partner, which they will define as love. “A man may be able to emotionally commit and attach himself to two women at the same time.
True love is never forgotten. Time may fade memories and bring healing to a broken heart, but that person is never erased from your mind, their presence is never entirely forgotten. Their love will always be missed. You will remember them in the most mundane tasks, as you will throughout the highlights of your life.