How powerful is an apology?

Our apology can help free the hurt person from life-draining anger, bitterness, and pain. It validates their reality by affirming that, yes, their feelings make sense, we get it, and we take full responsibility for our words and actions—or our failure to speak or act.

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Why are apologies so powerful?

Apologizing re-establish dignity for those you hurt: Letting the injured party know that you know it was your fault, not theirs, helps them feel better, and it helps them save face. Apologizing helps repair relationships: By getting people talking again, an apology makes them feel comfortable with each other again.

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How powerful is saying sorry?

“Sorry” may be the hardest word, but it also has the potential to be one of the most powerful words—a word of restoration, a word of healing and a word of starting over.

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What effects can an apology have?

An apology won't solve the conflict or erase the wounding. However, it can soften the pain and it often has the power to stop the emotional bleeding.

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Is apologizing weakness or strength?

Saying “I'm sorry” actually shows strength, not weakness. A person who can apologize—and truly mean it—is self-aware.

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The best way to apologize (according to science)

20 related questions found

What does a healthy apology look like?

Takes responsibility, explains but does not excuse why the mistake happened, expresses remorse and caring, and promises reparation. “I forgot. I apologize for this mistake. It shouldn't have happened.

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What kind of person apologizes?

The findings make intuitive sense — conscientious people tend to be efficient and well organized, so perhaps their organization skills even help them offer expedient apologies; it's also not surprising that honest people would be more likely to own up to something they'd done wrong.

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What is the psychology behind apologizing?

Apology is reconciliation, not submission.

Many people think they're apologizing when they're coming off as appeasing or patronizing or dismissive. Effective apology can make relationships more resilient; resiliency is a predictor of long-term relationship satisfaction.

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Is apologizing a trauma response?

These are all great topics to discuss, but it can prove challenging to distill these larger ideas into practice. But, when we talk about apologizing, we wrap all of these complex concepts up into a single practice. It's a common trauma-state response to want to avoid conflict.

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How does an apology make someone feel?

A person who has been harmed feels emotional healing when they are acknowledged by the wrongdoer. When we receive an apology, we no longer perceive the wrongdoer as a personal threat. Apology helps us to move past our anger and prevents us from being stuck in the past.

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What is stronger than I'm sorry?

1. “It Won't Happen Again” If you're truly apologetic about something, you'll obviously want to make every effort to ensure that it doesn't happen again down the road. So, why not reassure your colleague and explicitly say that?

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Does saying sorry mean you are weak?

Admit Your Mistakes, Correct them and Move on. What is wrong in saying Sorry for things that you never intended to hurt anyone. Sorry is not a sign of weak; it is a sign of Acceptance being a strong leader. This gives you more opportunities to grow and learn.

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Does apologizing take courage?

First, apologizing takes courage. It puts you in a vulnerable position, leaving you open to attack or blame. Some people struggle to be this brave. Or, you may be so full of shame and embarrassment over your actions that you can't bring yourself to face the other person.

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What is deepest apologies?

my (humble​/​deepest​/​sincere etc) apologies ​Definitions and Synonyms. phrase​formal. DEFINITIONS1. used for saying that you are sorry for something.

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What not to do when apologizing?

The more mindful you can be in the process of making amends, the more meaningful your words can be—and the more difference they can make.
  1. Re-trying your case. ...
  2. Promising something you can't deliver. ...
  3. Ignoring the reason the problem happened in the first place. ...
  4. Adding conditions that negate the apology.

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Is over apologizing a form of manipulation?

It's an interesting way to get attention and go into 'poor me' or feeling sorry for yourself mode which disempowers others. It is a manipulation that works. It forces the other person to feel sorry for you, and because you are so willing to take the blame, they hold back from kicking you when you are down.

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What trauma causes over apologizing?

It might have been rooted in a childhood trauma when, for example, avoiding the family fight in the case of domestic violence or an alcoholic parent was the only way to bring back the feeling of safety.

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What is the psychology behind not saying sorry?

When this happens, it's usually for one of two reasons: (1) We don't care enough about the other person or the relationship to take on the emotional discomfort of owning our mistake and apologizing for it; or (2) We believe our apology won't matter.

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Is apologizing good for mental health?

Apologizing positively impacts our mental health by reducing feelings of guilt and regret. When we apologize, we address the source of our negative emotions and work toward a resolution. It improves self-esteem, reduces anxiety, and improves overall mental health.

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Why do some people say I'm sorry a lot?

Some of the most common reasons, according to Jocelyn Hamsher, a therapist in Arizona, include: false guilt (feeling responsible for something you are not responsible for) carried guilt (feeling guilt for someone else's behavior because they don't feel guilt) people-pleasing (wanting others' approval)

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Is over apologizing healthy?

Although it may seem like a harmless — even overly polite — habit, it comes with consequences. Mental health professionals say over-apologizing can lead to resentment towards others, shame around one's identity, and a constant struggle to stand up for oneself.

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Who benefits from an apology?

People who have been hurt or humiliated often hope for an apology. They may hope that an apology from the person who caused them harm will restore dignity, trust, and a sense of justice.

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What is it called when someone apologizes but then blames you?

A non-apology apology, sometimes called a backhanded apology, nonpology, or fauxpology, is a statement in the form of an apology that does not express remorse for what was done or said, or assigns fault to those ostensibly receiving the apology.

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How do you apologize to someone you hurt deeply?

10 sincere ways to apologize to someone you hurt
  1. Never say, 'I put myself in your shoe. ...
  2. Acknowledging your mistake. ...
  3. Make this right, along with saying sorry. ...
  4. There is no place for 'but' while apologizing. ...
  5. Take complete responsibility for your action. ...
  6. Promise that you won't repeat it. ...
  7. Be authentic while apologizing.

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How do you know if someone is sincere in an apology?

A true apology does not include the word “but” (“I'm sorry, but …”). “But” automatically cancels out an apology, and nearly always introduces a criticism or excuse. A true apology keeps the focus on your actions—and not on the other person's response.

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