Using fear to control another person. For instance, a person may use threats of violence or physically intimidating body language. Using social inequities to control another person. For example, a neurotypical person might attempt to use a cognitive disability to demean another person or dismiss their experiences.
Manipulator may put on a look of surprise or indignation. This tactic makes the victim question their own judgment and possibly their own sanity. Manipulator tries to play dumb by pretending they do not know what the victim is talking about or is confused about an important issue brought to their attention.
The manipulator may experience physical, mental, emotional, or spiritual distress due to a guilty conscience and shame. The manipulator may feel stress and anxiety from having to constantly “cover” themselves, for fear of being found out and exposed.
To disarm a manipulator, postpone your answer to give yourself time to ponder, question their intent, look disinterested by not reacting, establish boundaries and say no firmly, maintain your self-respect by not apologizing when they blame you for their problems, and apply fogging to acknowledge any mistakes and end ...
The manipulative person will use their words and emotions to play on your feelings and make you do things for them without realizing what they're doing until it's too late. They'll often ask for favors from people, or try to guilt-trip others into giving up something or taking care of certain tasks for them.
Emotional manipulators may use your insecurities, flaws, and fears against you to bring you down, says Veasley. For example, they may bring up insecurities when you're already feeling down, or point out your flaws in front of others. Or, it may take the form of a backhanded compliment.
Psychologists say the root cause of manipulative behavior can often be toxic cycles of violence, narcissism, or unhealthy relationships in the manipulator's own childhood.
Eight of the most common manipulation tactics that narcissists use to control you are gaslighting, financial abuse, stonewalling, future faking, flying monkeys, narcissistic rage, intermittent reinforcement, and triangulation.
The questions are aimed at controlling your behavior — Manipulators may use questions to control your behavior, such as “Why can't you just do what I say?” They seem to have an agenda or ulterior motive: Manipulators often ask questions with the intention of achieving a specific goal or outcome.
They come on way too strong. In romantic situations, this is known as “love bombing.” Although to be fair, you can love bomb friends and colleagues, too. ...
Some research shows that people who have the ability to be emotionally manipulative, have high levels of emotional intelligence, which can be seen as a positive asset to the workplace.
The silent treatment is widely regarded as a form of emotional manipulation and even psychological abuse. It is the act of ceasing to initiate or respond to communication with someone else or refusing to acknowledge them altogether.
While most people engage in manipulation from time to time, a chronic pattern of manipulation can indicate an underlying mental health concern. Manipulation is particularly common with personality disorder diagnoses such as borderline personality (BPD) and narcissistic personality (NPD).
If the manipulator apologizes, they do it in a way that points the finger back at you. The underlying message is, “I'm sorry you think I did (or said) something wrong, but ultimately, that's on you. I'm innocent, you're overreacting, and I'm hurt that you would attack me this way.”