What is belittling? Belittling is the intentional act of making another feel worthless, empty, and dismissed. It is one of many forms of psychological and emotional abuse. Belittling another often creates a personal emptiness and void.
A remark that trivializes your feelings, thoughts, experiences, or accomplishments, making you feel unimportant, invalidating your feelings or downplaying your accomplishments.
The following are examples of what belittling looks like: Yelling or screaming at you to get a reaction. Insulting you — calling you fat, ugly or stupid — or criticizing your parenting skills or intelligence. Ignoring how you feel, disregarding your opinion or failing to recognize your contributions.
To belittle means to put down, or to make another person feel as though they aren't important. Saying mean things about another person literally makes them feel "little." To belittle someone is a cruel way of making someone else seem less important than yourself.
Emotional and psychological abuse can take many forms, including belittling, which can manifest as judging, humiliating, criticizing, trivializing or telling hurtful jokes. But belittling is no joking matter. It's a tactic often used by abusers to make their victims feel small, unimportant or disrespected.
Belittling someone means treating them in a way that makes them feel less than they are. It's a form of emotional abuse or insensitivity that is sometimes used to make the other person feel weaker.
It is a way of making the partner feel insignificant to cut down their confidence. It may also be a kind of manipulation. A person may often use belittling comments to manipulate the other one into making them more dependable on someone so that the person loses confidence.
While the act is committed by another, the rationale or motivation is frequently associated with the same level of insecurities, self-doubts, anger, hostilities, and personal lack of confidence. Belittling can have a most egregious impact upon the life of a child.
Gaslighting
Veasley says gaslighting is one of the most common forms of emotional manipulation and a toxic behavior you shouldn't tolerate. It's a good idea to identify ways to deal with gaslighting.
People with NPD may be intentionally arrogant, superior or vain. They will often act in a pretentious way in group settings, belittle others, and look to control conversations. While their self-concept is often an overinflated one, people with NPD typically have a fragile ego.
If you feel filled with self-doubt after an encounter with your coworker, you're probably experiencing gaslighting. A common way that gaslighters make you doubt yourself is by belittling the effort you put into your work. Other examples of gaslighting could be a coworker belittling your emotions and perceptions.
Narcissists belittle others because they have their own insecurities, fears and flaws, and are afraid of having them exposed to others. In making hurtful comments to others, they reinforce their own feelings of importance and hide the low self-esteem and self-worth that may be lurking within.
They turn the story around to make it seem like you are at fault, deflecting attention and blame away from them to make you feel guilty. This type of emotional manipulation is called gaslighting.
Demeaning behavior is that which is intended to cause a severe loss in the dignity and respect of someone; words or actions intended to debase, lower, degrade, discredit or devalue a person.
Things you should never tolerate in a relationship include not being cared about. After all, if that's the case, then what's the point of the relationship? Essentially, insults or hurtful comments about you, your job, goals, family, or anything else just don't come from a caring and loving partner.
Red flags in a relationship include excessive jealousy and frequent lying. You should also be wary of a partner who frequently criticizes you or puts you down. Another major red flag is an unwillingness to compromise — relationships shouldn't be one-sided.
There's No Emotional Connection
One of the key signs your relationship is ending is that you are no longer vulnerable and open with your partner. A cornerstone of happy, healthy relationships is that both partners feel comfortable being truly open to sharing thoughts and opinions with one another.
It's a Way to Deal With Their Insecurity
Insecure people may also belittle others to protect themselves from being vulnerable or rejected by others. This is especially common when the person belittling others has low self-esteem and frequently faces rejection or disapproval from those around them.
They want to manipulate the person.
It could also be a person seeking to guilt trip someone into doing what they want them to do. Putting others down and belittling them can weaken their self-belief and assertiveness, making them easier to influence.
If someone belittles you, you are better off using humor to deflect it, telling them upfront you don't appreciate it, or deflecting it right back on them. An example of deflecting it back on them is just to use the try-hard aspect of their put-down against them.
“A gaslighter will often make you beg for their forgiveness and apologize profusely for any 'wrong' you committed, even if it's something they did,” Stern says. Sometimes you may not even know what you're apologizing for, other than they're upset and it's your responsibility to calm them down.