Oversharing Like I tell total strangers about my sex life, being raped in high school, my family hating me and not wanting me, and other closely personal information. But I don't tell close friends the same information.” — Steven H.
People with BPD often engage in self-sabotaging behavior. This can include: Oversharing.
Examples of Oversharing
Posting intimate details about your relationships, friendships, family matters, or personal drama. Using social media as a soapbox or a way to vent your emotions. Posting photos or videos of things meant to be private. Posting embarrassing photos or videos of yourself or others.
Many mental health conditions such as Bipolar, Depression, or Anxiety can also cause oversharing. It can be a way to self gratify when you get attention from like-minded people who encourage you to relish in unhealthy behaviours.
For some people, sharing the intimate details of their lives can be empowering and freeing. But for many others, oversharing is a coping mechanism for anxiety, stress, and untreated trauma. In some cases, oversharing may be a cry for help from someone struggling to cope with their mental health.
RED: oversharing early in the relationship. Some information is first, second, third date material and some information is reserved for those who have shown they can hold space for stickier subjects. Oversharing doesn't create intimacy. Oversharing is self-absorption masked as vulnerability.
A common reason for oversharing is the desire to build depth and emotional intimacy before the relationship is ready. This can often be connected to stress or a fear of not being liked by the person.
If a person is a narcissist, or they feel inadequate, they often end up sharing everything that comes to mind to make sure they are heard. The insecurity of feeling ignored or too much self-validation overpowers their ability to decide what to share or not.
In severe circumstances, over-sharing may also be a symptom of mental health problems like bipolar disorder or borderline personality disorder, which can make people impulsive and emotionally unstable.
Others may overshare as a way to gain control over a situation. Oversharing may also be due to a lack of social skills or awareness of social boundaries. “Some people have not learned the appropriate way to maintain or establish relational boundaries,” Dr.
Is oversharing a symptom of ADHD? Officially, it's not. However, some symptoms of ADHD - such as being forgetful and getting impulsive - can cause you to share too much information to others.
Being careless with your privacy can open you and your family up to everything, from cyberbullying and theft to extortion and kidnap. Criminals can use social media geo-tagging, landmarks and research into your typical behaviour or schedule.
People with BPD are very sensitive to rejection. They may lie or exaggerate to cover mistakes or to maintain an overly positive image so that others will not reject them.
BPD provocation #1: Exaggerated over-generalizations and wild accusations. A high proportion of people with BPD often make overly dramatic, hyperbolic statements or accuse you of having ulterior motives for whatever you are doing or saying.
A fear of abandonment is central to BPD. That can present obvious problems in a relationship, especially when you're just getting to know someone and have no idea where things are heading. Unfortunately, intense fear can lead to your partner being clingy or making unreasonable demands on your time.
Those numbers stay pretty consistent across age groups and classes, Ipsos found. In fact, people older than 50 are the most likely to say they share "everything" online. Business-owners and executives -- many of whom are likely both educated and prosperous -- also lean toward oversharing.
Oversharing is a common struggle among people who lack personal boundaries.
Deal with a provocateur by politely acknowledging what they say, but declining to engage with it. Refrain from expressing surprise, as that fuels their oversharing. But do calmly change the topic to something more appropriate for how well you know each other.
Effects of Trauma Dumping & Oversharing
For some, it might be a way of seeking validation or attention. Others may feel that they need to unload the burden of their experience onto someone else. Still, others may not know how else to cope with their feelings surrounding the event.
If you live with complex trauma or post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD), trauma dumping or oversharing could be a natural trauma response and coping mechanism.
Trauma dumping: With trauma dumping, you overshare difficult or intimate personal information without the other person's consent or during inappropriate times. You don't consider how your words impact the listener, and you're not open to advice or solutions.
Trauma dumping is harmful, but it usually isn't done maliciously. Often, trauma dumping is a coping mechanism or an unhealthy, ineffective way of seeking emotional support. Those who engage in trauma dumping are sometimes unable or unwilling to deal with their own issues and feelings.
Oversharing in a relationship refers to sharing too much personal information or details with your partner that they may not be comfortable hearing. Because it causes discomfort, oversharing could even damage the relationship.
You tend to manipulate things
Manipulation ranges from gaslighting and lying to hiding information from your partner. If you're doing any of these things, you're clearly manipulating your partner and are the toxic one in the relationship. Ultimately, it will only erode your partner's love and respect for you.