A eulogy is a speech given at a memorial or funeral service. It can be delivered by a family member, close friend, priest, minister or celebrant and it commemorates and celebrates the life of the deceased.
Aside from a formal eulogy, there are many opportunities to speak at a funeral. Many people say prayers, recite poems, or tell stories about the person who died. If there are any special readings or anecdotes that you'd like to have shared at the funeral, think about whom you would like to deliver those.
The speech is ideally given by someone who knew the person well enough to gather and share memories and highlights of his/her life. Sometimes the choice is obvious within the family. There is often one person who seems to be the unofficial family spokesperson.
For example, you might start out like this: “I would like to welcome you to this celebration of the life of (NAME), who (passed, entered into rest, went to be with his beloved wife Glenda, went to be with his Savior) on (date).
There is no hard and fast rule as to who should give the eulogy speech at a funeral. It's typically given by those who were particularly close, or had a special relationship with, the loved one who passed. It could be a best friend, a spouse, a child or grandchild, or even a co-worker.
We find that most eulogies are between five and ten minutes in duration. If you are sharing the eulogy with others aim for around three minutes each. Adjust the content of your remembrance speech to ensure it is not too brief, or too lengthy.
Funeral Farewell Quotes for a Celebration of Life
A life well-lived finds rest and rewards in the afterlife. Farewell to our friend until that moment we meet again. Let not sorrow replace the love and memories of your friend. Rejoice in the kingdom of God that has unfolded and welcomed our beloved.
It is not written anywhere that you have to speak at your loved one's funeral. There are no rules requiring such a moment. If you feel compelled to greet and thank all those gathered or share your thoughts about your loved one, write your thoughts and have someone else read your words during the service.
During a funeral ceremony, you typically stay silent unless invited to speak during the service. At a visitation, you usually chat with the family and other guests.
Funeral speeches can be extremely difficult. You've just lost someone, you're still in shock and now you've got to get up in front of people and talk about the person you're mourning. However, making a funeral speech can turn out to be a truly beautiful thing.
Greeting People At The Funeral
When you do greet people, don't feel like you have to have a lengthy conversation. Simply saying hello and thanking people for coming is sufficient.
The worst things to say at a funeral
Don't tell friends or family members who are grieving that their loved one has gone to a better place. Never call the death a blessing or speculate that it was that person's time. Avoid saying anything that suggests that the loss of the loved one is a positive thing.
The front rows are for the immediate family so sit nearer the back if you did not know the person very well. However, if there are few mourners present then sit nearer to the front. It does not matter which side of the 'aisle' you sit.
Other guests who are attending the funeral may also travel behind the funeral procession. The family of the deceased may decide on the order in which the funeral procession enters the place of worship or crematorium. The officiant will usually lead the procession and pallbearers carrying the coffin tend to follow.
"Talking or being on your phone during the service is one of the most disrespectful things you could do at a funeral," says Myka Meier, Beaumont Etiquette founder and etiquette expert. It's important to be as present as possible. "Silence your phone, shut off your phone, or even just leave it behind.
Attending a visitation can be the hardest part for people to attend, because it involves talking to the deceased's family. A good recommendation is to say something simple such as “I am sorry about your loss”, especially if there are many other guests waiting to share their condolences.
Avoid platitudes that can perceived as insensitive, like "He's in a better place," and "The pain will lessen in time." Don't ask how the person died, or tell the bereaved you know how they feel.
Remember to introduce yourself in your speech and who you are in relation to the loved one who has passed. This will help give the audience context and better understand the memories that you are sharing.