The workplace. The workplace is where most affairs begin. It doesn't hurt that we usually dress nicely and are on “good behavior” at work. Plus, having shared passions about projects (or mutual annoyance at a boss or co-worker) provides the perfect breeding ground for an affair.
Affairs usually begin with an attraction to someone you know fairly well, someone you spend time with each week — your friends and co-workers.
It is a sad reality that adultery is alive and well in our churches. The Rest: Bars, Spouse's friends, Las Vegas, Business trips, the Gym, Neighbors, Grocery stores, etc. People who cheat can meet just about anywhere.
Loved-up couples be warned: September has been named the month when affairs are most likely to begin. Overtaking January as the biggest month for infidelity, new research has found those looking to stray are more likely to start an affair in September than any other time of the year.
Extramarital Affairs/Infidelities are common. Most estimates indicate that around 60% of men and 45% of women are willing to report that an affair has occurred sometime in their marriage and it suggests that 70% of all marriages experience an affair.
Close to 25% of marriages stay together after an instance of cheating. And more men than women stay married when they are the cheating partner (61% vs 44%).
Here's what we do know about the prevalence of cheating. A 2021 survey by Health Testing Centers polled 441 people and reported: a little over 46% of respondents in a monogamous relationship said they had affairs. nearly 24% of marriages affected by infidelity reported staying together.
Women in their 60s report the highest rate of infidelity (16%), but the share goes down sharply among women in their 70s and 80s. By comparison, the infidelity rate among men in their 70s is the highest (26%), and it remains high among men ages 80 and older (24%).
Yet, most affairs usually end one of two ways: with divorce or a stronger current relationship. How the end plays out is up to you, how you choose to react, and how hard you want to work to stay together. Learning how to overcome grief and pain is going to be difficult, but Couples Academy can help.
The stress of the holidays
Since this data has been released, researchers have tried to pinpoint why January, out of all the months of the year, is the most common month for infidelity to occur.
Research in the field of infidelity reveals that there are three distinct personality types correlated with a higher likelihood of cheating: sociopaths, narcissists, and lonely hearts.
There are consistent associations between infidelity and each of the Big 5 traits. For example, people who cheat in romantic relationships score higher on Neuroticism, Openness to Experience, and Extraversion. They score lower on Agreeableness and Conscientiousness.
An affair will last as long as it suits its purpose, and no longer. Some affairs last only a couple hours, while others can last a lifetime. Most affairs come to light one way or another, which can cut them short or – if the cheated spouse agrees to let the cheater continue for reasons of their own – extend them.
Usually, emotional infidelity starts with a harmless crush. But once we start to flirt and spend more time with someone we have our eye on, a relationship can develop that has romantic potential. Eventually, this opens the door to physical infidelity.
First, affairs are often a replication waiting to happen. And second, affairs are often forged with the same magnetic power that a marriage is, often rendering the affair as hard to break as a marriage. Thus, ending an affair, especially if it is long-term, may resemble a divorce.
In fact, when it comes to purely sexual infidelity, the average occurrence across studies is around 20% of all couples. However, this rate increases to around a third of couples when you include emotional infidelity. An affair is generally a sign things aren't right with someone's relationship.
Yes, there is definitely a connection between midlife crisis and affairs. However, this happens in both men and women (though more common in men), as both are similarly burdened by the fear of aging and their mortality. The saying “if you are not moving forward, you are falling behind” is a common belief among men.
According to the General Social Survey, men are more likely to cheat than women, with 20% of men and 13% of women reporting having sex with someone other than their partner while still married. However, the gender gap varies per age.
Research from the past two decades shows that between 20 and 25 percent of married men cheat and between 10 and 15 percent of married women cheat, according to professor Nicholas Wolfinger. Read more here.
According to WebMD, the “in love” stage of an affair lasts 6 to 18 months, on average. And around 75% of the marriages that start as affairs end in divorce. Considering only 5 to 7% of affair relationships lead to marriage, that's a grim statistic for couples hoping their affairs will last forever.
Which Countries Have the Highest Rates of Infidelity? There are several countries in which cheating is relatively common. Thailand is an outlier, but it is also at the top of the list. More than half of people in Thailand who are married admit to committing infidelity at least once during the course of the marriage.
The most important thing to remember is what cheating says about a person. They're insecure, impulsive, selfish, and immature. Sometimes, it's a chronic problem that likely won't ever be fixed, just be sure not to ignore the warning signs.