If a partner constantly goes through your phone and social media, it could signify controlling and unhealthy behavior. If they are always checking on your calls, texts, social media, and digital activity, you may have a controlling and potentially abusive partner.
Cellphones can cause problems where there is insecurity and no trust in a relationship. A partner who constantly wants to check your phone might have been previously cheated on or might be a controlling person. It is not healthy to be in a relationship where you feel on guard and under surveillance.
Only if you give her permission.
It's never okay for your girlfriend to go through your phone without your knowledge. If she does, she's disrespecting you and violating your privacy. Don't let this behavior slide. Talk to her about how you feel because relationships are based on trust.
If you have a habit of always checking your husband's phone when he goes to bed at night, make it a new habit to pick up a book during that time, or power his device down and put it in another room. When you feel the urge to open his email, go for a walk or remove yourself from the room for 10 minutes.
"Snooping on your partner may lead them to believe you doubt their ability to be faithful and make the right decisions," says Rhonda Richards-Smith, LCSW, a psychotherapist and relationship expert. "If your partner believes you lack faith in them, this can lead to an even deeper communication breakdown."
Surprisingly though, 25% of study participants who had been snooped on decided to stay in the relationship and found that the partnership got stronger because of it.
May Have Trust Issues
Tirrell DeGannes, Licensed Clinical Psychologist in New York City, says that looking through your partner's phone “may infer that trust is not well-built between the two people in the relationship. Curiosity is one thing but actively going through someone's phone is an exercise of mistrust.
Snooping through your partner's phone is a privacy violation and is not okay. It is an invasion of their privacy and can damage the relationship. When you snoop through someone's phone, you are basically looking through their personal information without their consent.
Don't say things like 'I'm sorry, but I wouldn't have done it if you did. ' Instead, tell them how sorry you are and admit that you're in the wrong. Don't try to justify your snooping, and don't blame your partner for your actions. Reassure them that you'd NEVER snoop again if they give the relationship another chance.
Both experts agree that secretly going through your partner's phone is not appropriate, but there is one scenario when it's OK to have a look: when it's part of being totally transparent after they have cheated. Notably, in this situation, you aren't snooping on their phone or violating their trust.
Password-sharing behaviors can be controlling.
You don't have the right to know each and every aspect of their life and you do not have the right to monitor everything they do. This kind of behavior is highly abusive and usually a sign that things can escalate into various types of conflict.
Experts agree that honesty is the best policy in any relationship — so as a general rule, it's a good idea to admit to the snooping.
So, Is It Ever OK? The long and short of it: No, it's generally not OK. It's a violation of your partner's privacy and a breach of trust ― not to mention, it's often unproductive: You might find nothing and then feel like a jerk for snooping. You might find something small and innocent and blow it out of proportion.
Everyone has a right to privacy in their relationship. Observing your partner's privacy is a sign that you respect your partner's boundaries and trust them to share what is important with you. Having this sense of privacy helps people maintain an independent sense of self and have time and space to themselves.
Excessive device usage acts as a barrier to quality communication, which leaves partners feeling ignored or unimportant. Excessive device usage acts as a barrier to quality communication, which leaves partners feeling ignored or unimportant.
Relationship insecurity can be caused by many different things, but it is often the result of feeling abandoned, neglected, or not good enough. There are signs that indicate your relationship is unhealthy and you may be feeling insecure for a reason.
Maybe it's fun and a temporary time pass of having a good time. Phone sex also relieves stress and gives relaxation. The relationship grows closer than ever before. But the true fact is that you can't ignore the negative effects on your health, MAINLY ON YOUR MIND.
Jayant says, “In an emotionally draining relationship, you will always appear to be bending backward to do what your partner wants and needs. It's always about your partner's wishes and desires. Your effort in the relationship isn't equally reciprocated.
Cathy Vandewater from Bustle sums it up thusly: "If you feel like your person still brings out the best in you even during tough times — if you find yourself apologizing when you're wrong, trying to be a better listener, or laughing your way out of arguments — you've got a relationship worth working on. "
The main signs of emotional security in a relationship are that you both feel comfortable, safe, and confident about each other and the bond. This helps build a loving, lasting bond.