Children in dysfunctional families often experience some form of childhood trauma physical or emotional abuse, neglect, abandonment, witnessing violence, homelessness, etc. Below is a list of experiences that are common among children in dysfunctional families.
Effects of Growing Up in a Dysfunctional Family
A disrupted sense of trust – in yourself, in others, in the world. Difficulty dating and forming healthy relationships. Increased risk of alcohol and drug abuse. Increased risk for psychiatric disorders, such as anxiety, panic, depression, among others.
Psychological trauma is not always a result of growing up in a toxic family environment, although it can be a contributing factor. A child can experience a car accident resulting in a parent's death which may cause psychological trauma.
Adolescence is a stage of biological, social, and mental changes [1]. Circumstances such as family influence, quality of life, and school performance, may generate psychological and emotional disorders such as depression, anxiety, and post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD) [2].
Children from dysfunctional families are also more likely to become withdrawn and socially isolated. They often feel lonely and have difficulty expressing their feelings, and they are at risk of developing depression, low self-esteem, anxiety, and more. As children mature, these problems persist.
Children from dysfunctional families suffer from a number of fears that do not correspond with age norm. It reveals their tendency to infantilization and natural ageing process slowdown. Conflict relationships in dysfunctional families trigger children's anxiety, increasing and perpetuating their fears.
In dysfunctional families, these behaviors have been coined “toxic” because they can cause relational harm to other members. These emotionally violent behaviors can cause depression, anxiety, low self-esteem, and feelings of helplessness for the victims and even the whole family system.
The signs of trauma in a child include obsession with death or safety and issues with sleeping, eating, attention, and regulating emotions. Kids who have experienced trauma may also start to avoid school, especially if their trauma happened at school or is related to school, such as the death of a classmate.
Parentification is a form of invisible childhood trauma. Parentification occurs when the roles between a child and a parent are reversed. You know you were parentified if as a child you have to step up as the caretaker, mediator, or protector of the family.
Adults who have experienced childhood trauma usually have heightened levels of anxiety. They may worry excessively and have trouble managing their anxiety. It can lead to persistent feelings of sadness, lack of interest in activities, and difficulty experiencing pleasure.
A growing body of research suggests that trauma (like from childhood abuse, family violence, or food insecurity, among many other things) can be passed from one generation to the next. Here's how: Trauma can leave a chemical mark on a person's genes, which can then be passed down to future generations.
The mother wound is the cultural trauma that is carried by a mother – along with any dysfunctional coping mechanisms that have been used to process that pain – and inherited by her children (with daughters generally bearing the brunt of this burden).
Factors that can impair a family's functioning include poor parenting, distressed or abusive environments, substance abuse, mental illness, chronic physical illness, and poor communication.
Many eldest daughters are subjected to a form of parentification, which Healthline defines as a type of dysfunction wherein kids take on traditional parenting roles in the household: “Instead of giving to their child, the parent takes from them. In this role reversal, the parent may delegate duties to the child.
Enmeshment trauma is a type of childhood emotional trauma that involves a disregard for personal boundaries and loss of autonomy between individuals. The purpose of enmeshment is to create emotional power and control within the family.
Your grief about your own childhood may be triggered after becoming a parent. And, moreover, this grief and mourning can be triggered again and again, long after we think we've done the bulk of our grieving.
Without treatment, repeated childhood exposure to traumatic events can affect the brain and nervous system and increase health-risk behaviors (e.g., smoking, eating disorders, substance use, and high-risk activities).
Young Children and Trauma. Children can experience trauma as early as infancy. In fact, young children between the ages of 0 and 5 are the most vulnerable to the effects of trauma since their brains are still in the early formative years.
Here are some common signs of toxic behavior from a family member: Their perception of you doesn't jibe with the way you see yourself. They accuse you of things that you feel aren't true. They make you feel like you're never enough or bad about yourself, or otherwise emotionally destabilized.
What does it mean to be the “black sheep” of the family? A “black sheep” is a family member who is marginalized, treated differently, or excluded by the rest of the family. Black sheep, also known as marginalized family members, often feel hurt, inadequate, and lonely.