Interestingly, some narcissists are attracted to people who cry in front of them. This usually happens when they're hunting for an egotistical supply and need fresh victims. Crying is a sign of vulnerability, so they see the tears as a way in.
Your tears also put the spotlight on you, which is unacceptable for a narcissist. Another reason your tears may anger the narcissist is the fact that they may feel controlled by your tears. After all, they often use their own tears to manipulate and control others.
Some narcissists like when you cry if you don't typically cry in front of people. When they know your tears are solely reserved for them, it makes them feel more important. This, in turn, can maintain some of their high egos.
Narcissists try to make you upset to project their negative emotions onto you. This allows them to regain control over their negative emotions and protect their emotional stability.
They Face a Setback, Disappointment, or Conflict
A narcissist can become easily enraged if a setback occurs in their life, job, or relationship. Not getting their way results in both a loss of control and a bruised ego.
Although narcissists act superior, entitled and boastful, underneath their larger-than-life facade lies their greatest fear: That they are ordinary. For narcissists, attention is like oxygen. Narcissists believe only special people get attention.
They're often introverted, sensitive, and prone to experiencing anxiety and shame. They may also struggle to maintain close friendships as they focus heavily on themselves, require attention, and are hyper-sensitive to perceived criticism.
They can know they're hurting your feelings, but as long as it elevates their status, they may not care. Someone living with narcissism does cry. They can feel regret, remorse, and sadness. These emotions, however, don't often have roots in empathy.
Narcissists and psychopaths are well-known for a tactic known as “baiting.” They deliberately provoke you so that you emotionally react and swallow their blameshifting hook, line, and sinker.
Sometimes referred to as malignant narcissists, these individuals take great pleasure in watching or causing others to suffer. Malignant narcissists are basically bullies, who enjoy tormenting insecure people in order to make themselves feel like they are worth something.
Interestingly, some narcissists are attracted to people who cry in front of them. This usually happens when they're hunting for an egotistical supply and need fresh victims. Crying is a sign of vulnerability, so they see the tears as a way in.
Lack of Empathy
According to the Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders, narcissists lack empathy. They're “unwilling to recognize or identify with the feelings and needs of others.” (APA, 2013) Research shows that they have structural abnormalities in brain regions associated with emotional empathy.
Narcissists are not envious of others for having emotions. They disdain feelings and sentimental people because they find them to be weak and vulnerable and they deride human frailties and vulnerabilities.
Narcissists don't know they're hurting you. It doesn't even enter their minds. And, if you try to tell them how you feel, they get defensive and make you feel you're wrong again. In fact, they'll even rather “innocently” tell you: “I'm only trying to help you.”
If the narcissists sees you doing well and looking swell, they're going to get antsy. They will ask around about you to basically check that you're doing as good as you seem to be. They want to know if more about what the deal is and will ask friends, family and anyone else for details.
They will often deploy a variety of narcissistic relationship patterns such as manipulation, charismatic, and exploitational tactics in order to ensure that their own needs and wants are met. As a spouse, you may be the subject of their manipulation and abuse, while your partner treats everyone else positively.
A narcissistic person might use this strategy to get your attention. They might say, “give me a call, I have to tell you something,” or “I heard a juicy rumor about you”. Naturally, you will want to know and feel tempted to take the bait.
They want to see how much they can destroy you
Narcissists thrive on chaos, so they do not act out of jealousy, as that would imply they want your relationships, career, wealth, or health for themselves. Rather, they just don't want to see other people happy.
Unless they have had a lot of successful psychotherapy for their NPD, they do not feel guilt, shame, or self-doubt so long as their narcissistic defenses hold. This means that they do not think there is anything for them to regret, no matter how hurt you feel.
Simply put, narcissists hate being ignored. They probably want to make you feel ashamed, regretful, and rattled. They want to be in control and will go to any length to keep feeling empowered. It's critical to understand that a narcissist will not leave you alone the first time you ignore them.
They get jealous about everything
They talk a good game, but narcissists actually have very low self-esteem. Low self-worth/confidence/esteem is at the core of a narcissism. This low sense of self naturally makes it extremely easy for them to become jealous – very jealous.
Narcissists are uncertain of the boundaries between themselves and others and vacillate between dissociated states of self-inflation and inferiority. The self, divided by shame, is made up of the superior-acting, grandiose self and the inferior, devalued self.
Exhaustion plays a major role in the mini-cycles. His energy depleted, his creativity at its end, his resources stretched to the maximum, the narcissist reposes, "plays dead", withdraws from life. This is the phase of "narcissistic hibernation".